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SUNSHINE65
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A Good Pun is Its Own Reword

Sunday, February 26, 2012

- A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.

- Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.

- Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.

- A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

- Sea captains don't like crew cuts.

- Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

- Reading while sunbathing makes you well-red.

- When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.

- A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired.

- What's the definition of a will? (Come on, It's a dead giveaway!)

- A backward poet writes inverse.

- In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes.

- A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

- Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft, and I'll show you A flat minor.

- When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.

- The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

- A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

- You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

- Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down under.

- He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key.

- Every calendar's days are numbered.

- A lot of money is tainted. It taint yours and it taint mine.

- A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

- He had a photographic memory that was never developed.

- A plateau is a high form of flattery.

- The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

- Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.

- Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine.

- When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.

- Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.

- Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.

- Acupuncture is a jab well done.

- Marathon runners with bad footwear suffer the agony of defeat.

- The poor guy fell into a glass grinding machine and made a spectacle of himself.

And Finally, This...

Doctor, Doctor, I can't get to sleep.
Sit on the edge of the bed and you'll soon drop off.

Doctor, Doctor You've got to help me - I just can't stop my hands shaking
Do you drink a lot?
Not really - I spill most of it!

Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I'm a woodworm
How boring for you!

Doctor, Doctor I think I'm a bridge
What's come over you?
Oh, two cars, a large truck and a coach.

Doctor, Doctor I think I'm an electric eel
That's shocking!

Doctor, Doctor I think I'm a python
You can't get round me just like that you know!
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