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    MSBETH   3,528
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2,500-3,999 SparkPoints
 
 

I am worth it.


Tuesday, February 21, 2012

So, boy has 2012 been a ROUGH year for me, weight wise. Itís been so hard. Iíve gained some weight back and I feel like I am in such a struggle to get back on track. Some days, all I wanna do is give up. That damn voice in my head keeps telling me that I will never reach my goal and Iím not worth it. I keep trying to shut her up, but she keeps going and going andÖ I was starting to believe itÖ but... I KNOW I DESERVE BETTER THAN THIS. I broke down this morning and just cried Ė like one of those embarrassing ugly cries. (lol). Iíve been feeling so hopeless. I know I can do it soÖ. Why am I NOT DOING IT? I know Iím only giving like maybe 40% of my effort, which I know is better than nothing butÖ itís not going to help me reach my goal. I do want this, so why am I not acting like I do by doing what needs to be done. Laziness, maybe? I donít knowÖ stress in my life? I know those are all excuses butÖ they are really hard to shut up from my mind. Itís such a mental freaking battleÖ but Iím here to say, ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. If I want this, I need to forgive myself for my mistakes and STOP DWELLING. Yes, I have made several mistakes in regards to my weight loss efforts this year but, thereís no better time to forgive myself and keep moving forward than TODAY. And thatís exactly what I am going to do. SO here, I am saying it now, I forgive myself of all the crappy food I have eaten over the last few months and all the times I didnít go to the gym and perhaps I wonít be meeting my goal by summer, but I AM WORKING ON MY GOAL and THAT is the most important part. Itís not a race itís a lifelong journey and I have to keep telling myself that b/c once I get to my goal I will then have to work to maintain b/c I do not want to yo-yo. So hereís to TODAY and I promise myself that every time I try to look to far ahead and feel like itís overwhelming, I will remind myself that it is not a race and I am working on this ONE DAY AT A TIME and more importantly Ė I AM WORTH IT.

I need a support system!!! But it seems like the groups I joing don't have too many active members...
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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
*AMBER512 2/21/2012 2:53PM

    Thanks for commenting on my Sparkiversary blog. I'm so glad that you took the message to heart. You are worth it! And you can do it. :)

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SAMANTHAV1MS 2/21/2012 9:47AM

    You can do this! I was in the same boat. This past fall I was working out but making poor food choices. The scale didn't budge. What really seems to have helped me maintain my motivation is setting up a system of rewards for myself. I have a set of rewards for weight loss but also for my behavior. So I get a reward if I food log and workout for four consecutive weeks even if the scale doesn't move. Last week I earned a manicure and a pedicure. I am saving them for a time when I feel low and might over indulge in sweets. This week I earned my 5 lb loss reward...a 90 minute massage. Just remember nothing is impossible. It's just a matter of setting yourself up to win. For me that means earning things I wouldn't normally give myself. There is a great website/Facebook motivation site I use too called Skinny Ms. Fitness. She is running an ab challenge that I am doing this week too.

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SHERYLDS 2/21/2012 9:41AM

    IF YOU WANT A VERY VERY ACTIVE GROUP
JOIN....DONE BEING THE FAT GIRL team
you can find in on my sparkpage.

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SHERYLDS 2/21/2012 9:39AM

    please don't beat yourself up when you fail! Instead, congratulate yourself for trying. Then try something different.

ďThe only real failure in life is one not learned from.Ē ~Anthony J. DíAngelo

ďYou have to have confidence in your ability, and then be tough enough to follow through.Ē ~Rosalynn Carter
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TWINKIEQUEEN 2/21/2012 9:39AM

    i can emphathize with how you are feeling....be strong...be focused...you CAN do this......

look around for different groups that will be supportive...do you speak spanish? the 2 spanish groups i belong to are always discussing different weight loss issues and having various monthly challenges which you can join if you so choose...i am sure there are similar english-speaking ones, altho i could not name any....ask around...good luck to you

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