Friday, February 17, 2012
A year ago I was featured in a magazine, thanks to the staff at Sparkpeople. Today, I am not in the same shape. I stopped tracking my food and cut down on some work outs. The result is a weight swing from 127lbs to 155lbs. I am certainly back down to a healthier me, but nowhere near the fitness level I was 9 months ago. I had said that 135 would be my "cap", then 140, 145... feel me? But for me, it's more than the number on the scale that matters. My self-esteem is deflating as fast as my endurance.
I know I need to add more running, but I have a hard time taking that first step out the door. So, I have been showing up to my workout class 20 minutes early to get in an extra run or bag work.
I have also started taking a boxing class one night a week (while it's not kids' sports seasons.) I love it and really don't want to give it up come cheer season, but my daughter has practice nightly, so that already makes me sad.
Eating, I have been making better choices, but not the regular..healthy ones I used to. This is where I am struggling the most. I know what works for me, I maintained an 85 pound loss for quite some time, but the minute I stopped logging in here.... I lost my balance.
This is hard, for everyone. The struggle for some of us isn't over at goal. It's a lifetime of getting back up, dusting back off and choosing to want to be healthy. I don't need to be a supermodel, or even wear a bikini ever again. I just want to feel good, live life well and pass on life enhancing tools to my children.