Advertisement -- Learn more about ads on this site.

    SHRINKINGLULU   12,447
10,000-14,999 SparkPoints

Don't Karate Chop My Face. (w/pics!)

Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

You know how everyone, when you're single, says that you will only find the right person when you stop looking?

And it's super annoying and makes you kind of want to karate chop them in the face?

But then you finally get mad and give up on looking and just when you get the hang of being you, and working on that, you DO find someone, and all those annoying people were right, and you're simultaneously happy and want to karate chop them in the face even harder because then they get all smug about it?

(Please do not chop my face if you are sick of one or both of these. Just take comfort in knowing that I am quite ungraceful and inflict minor pain on myself through spazticness on a regular basis, so the universe is kind of karate chopping me for you already).

I've decided that, for me, ONEderland was very much the same.

I cried, I pouted, I sabotaged, I over-trained, I got super strict with my eating, I got mad that wasn't working and ate a whole pint of Ben and Jerry's. Twice. I threatened my scale every creative form of destruction I could come up with...

And then I finally got so frustrated with wanting that 1 SO BAD, that I was just... over it.

SO over it.

I had a big long talk with myself about how stupid I was being. Why did I care so much?
Me, the one who tells myself and others that the scale is a pretty lame way to track success at getting healthier and into shape, or thinner even.
The person who's gotten pretty obsessed with building muscle instead of just burning fat.
The person who was so proudly bragging about being in the smallest clothes I've worn since my junior year of college, despite weighing more, because that meant I have more muscle.

How does THAT person care so much about a number on a stupid scale?

They DON'T! That's how!!

So I stopped caring, or at least stopped caring that it was taking a lot longer than I wanted it to.

And guess what happened?

I stopped overanalyzing myself and everything I was doing.

When I stopped thinking so much about having less diet soda and more water it stopped occurring to me to have a diet soda in the first place, so I drank more water.

When I stopped constantly telling myself to not have any of the Valentine's candy in my office I had none, or 1 dark hershey kiss, because I wasn't thinking about candy, instead of thinking about it all damn day and either eating 12 peanut butter chocolate hearts (or wishing I had) and being mad about it.

When I stopped lecturing myself about how I needed to get more sleep I stopped laying in bed internally yelling at myself for not being asleep and actually got some. And had a nifty dream with a pagasus in it.

(I cannot draw pegasuses... pegasi?)

And then I lost 2 pounds.
From one day to the next.
And the scale has stayed there for 4 days, even with a couple meals out, and a day of eating out in the city on Saturday, and an early Valentine's celebration day out with the boyfriend on Sunday, and a really yummy snickerdoodle cookie yesterday.

It's official; I'm in ONEderland!!

But you know what's weirdest of all?

I'm not nearly as excited about it as I thought I'd be...
It's just another number on a scale, and scales aren't a particularly good measure of the success of all my hard work, so... it's nice.
It's really nice.
But it's nice like when the vending machine accidentally gives you two water bottles; exciting, but not THAT exciting.
It's not exciting like Publishers Clearing House knocking on my door with the balloons and the big check and the whole shebang exciting.

Frankly I'm a whole heck of a lot more excited, now, about the milestone that comes with the next 0.2 lbs I'll lose: 60lb lost total!
A whole 10lb more than I lost with SP last time around, when at the end I gave in to some pretty terrible habits to get there.
A whole 10lb more than I've ever lost before.
A whole 60lb less than where I started.

And even way more exciting than THAT?
I did push ups with THESE last night!!!! AT THE SAME TIME! And lived to tell the tale!

(That is not me, by the way. I'm sure I looked significantly less coordinated and about 27 times more amazed that my body was actually doing that. Also sweatier. MUCH sweatier.)

If you want to share this or any of my blogs outside of sparkpeople, please feel free to do so. I ask, though, that you do it from my blog site - I put some pretty personal stuff here on sparkpeople and it's weird to think of non-SP people reading that stuff, but this site has just the funny stuff!

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
TQUARRY 3/12/2012 6:26PM

    so awesome!

Report Inappropriate Comment
ANGIEJAY77 3/8/2012 3:04PM

    I'm not at that point yet where the scale doesn't dictate how successful I am...but I am getting there. Thanks for sharing!

Report Inappropriate Comment
FREETHEGODDESS 2/29/2012 10:14AM

    You have found the balance in your program. WooHoo! Obsessing is not healthy and ignoring our goals/program doesn't work either. But, finding balance in tracking our food intake and exercise and not putting everything under a microscope constantly gets the best results and keeps us sane.

Yes, you have found the "sweet spot" in this journey to a healthy, balanced life! Great job!

Congratulations on reaching ONEderland and losing 60 lbs. YOU ROCK!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
RASCALRACCOON 2/23/2012 3:59PM

    Its amazing what happens when we stop obessessing and letting our brains run the show and we just let our instinct kick in ;) LOVE it - and congrats! xx

Report Inappropriate Comment
BANDMOM2012 2/19/2012 8:41PM

    Yay you made it! Love the cartoons!

Report Inappropriate Comment
BLOOMING52 2/19/2012 7:36AM


Report Inappropriate Comment
EYES_ON_THEPRAZ 2/17/2012 7:05PM

    emoticon emoticon I wanna be like you when I grow up. Oh wait, I think we're the same age. Damn.

Report Inappropriate Comment
HARTINGL52 2/17/2012 1:18PM

    I like your sketches and your attitude. Keep up the great monologue. You are awesome. emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JIBBIE49 2/17/2012 12:40AM


Report Inappropriate Comment
TUBJUMPER 2/16/2012 10:09PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
INTRIGUEDKI 2/16/2012 9:19PM

    This blog was awesome and had me laughing so hard! LOL Congrats on your success and I love the pictures. :-)

Report Inappropriate Comment
RELISA4HEALTH 2/16/2012 9:09PM

    Thank you for sharing with us your thoughts on the process of getting fit. I liked the pictures. Clever way of making your blog interesting.

Report Inappropriate Comment
KIPPER15 2/16/2012 9:09PM

    I tend to over analyze every thing. I need to chill too.

Report Inappropriate Comment
GAMMALEAK 2/16/2012 8:50PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
LIVINHEALTHY9 2/16/2012 7:45PM

    I really enjoyed your blog. And the cartoons are awesome.
Sometimes, we just need to roll with it, and chill out on the stressing out. Now, if I can just follow that advice.

Report Inappropriate Comment
REBECCA180 2/16/2012 7:23PM

    You're such a great writer. Thanks for putting in words, what's in my head!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
BARBARASDIET 2/16/2012 5:59PM

    Maybe some day I can stop caring about the scale....

Report Inappropriate Comment
REFFIE1 2/16/2012 5:54PM

    Love your toons and sassy attitude. Keep up the fantastic blogging! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TIFFY0906 2/16/2012 5:35PM

    Love this blog

Thanks for reminding us to just "chillax" sometimes.

Report Inappropriate Comment
OCEANROSE1 2/16/2012 4:52PM

    I literally spit out the tea I was casually drinking while reading your blog. It was so funny. I love your writing. I really needed this today. Thanks.

Report Inappropriate Comment
HHB4181 2/16/2012 3:01PM

    great blog.

Report Inappropriate Comment
EUNIQ3 2/16/2012 2:59PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
GETTING_FIT44 2/16/2012 2:38PM

    Just needed to say that you are so right! I need to stop freaking and over thinking about everything. And I even stress and freak out about whether or not I am doing needs to stop!!!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
SKINNYMINNIE25 2/16/2012 2:24PM

    Thanks for reminding me to take a chill pill emoticon
I've been eating chocolate at work and avoiding getting on the emoticon
I've been feeling sluggish in spite of enough emoticon and plenty of emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

So what's the problemo? I haven't got a clue but I need to get back with the emoticon program and start charting again.

I love your blog.

emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MIMI315 2/16/2012 2:00PM

    I absolutely loved your blog! I don't get a chance to read them often so I'm glad I came across yours emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment

(p.s. Love your drawings!)

Report Inappropriate Comment
MRSSCHENCK 2/16/2012 1:55PM

    emoticon on entering ONEderland! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
GENNIFER37 2/16/2012 1:33PM

    You are hilarious! Thanks for sharing.

Report Inappropriate Comment
FEISTYOWL 2/16/2012 1:18PM

    I love your blog!! So right on. I feel the same way - when I stop obsessing I seem to do the right thing without thinking about it. Funny that. Thanks for writing it out so well!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
CALI_POPPY 2/16/2012 1:17PM

    Thank you for making me laugh and cry...I really needed to see this today. You are super talented, funny, insightful and an inspiration in more ways than one.

Report Inappropriate Comment
MISSFORTE 2/16/2012 1:07PM

    love it and your so right! When I don't obsess what I can't have I do better. When I don't obsess about not doing another Rep of something new I've learned and build myself up I do better!

Your so right when your not looking....................

Report Inappropriate Comment
ARROW868 2/16/2012 1:02PM

    This made me Charlie loud laugh!

Congrats on ONEderland. Love your sense of humour, you have an uncanny ability to help other's keep things in perspective.

Report Inappropriate Comment
PGNBRI 2/16/2012 11:30AM


Report Inappropriate Comment
DOTSLADY 2/16/2012 11:25AM

    Okay, I don't have time to read blogs today, but ... I read this and it made me smirk, snort, and chuckle. Not a bad way to start the day. You're a cute doll-face in ONEderland. Welcome. Glad you're enjoying the ride. I'm enjoying your ride, too. LOL.
Keep up the good works on yourself.
emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LUCKYONE60 2/16/2012 11:18AM

    Good one! I love your cartoons, but I think you're going to have to draw yourself with more of a figure...just a thought. Keep up the good work!

Report Inappropriate Comment
CAROLINA_KOUKLA 2/16/2012 10:49AM

  Huge eye opener!!! Love this blog :o)

Congrats on hitting ONEderland!

Report Inappropriate Comment
NURSEA32 2/16/2012 10:36AM

    This blog rocks:) Love the illustrations!! Congrats on onderland!! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ALIENANGEL 2/16/2012 10:34AM

    wow. just wow. rock on.

Report Inappropriate Comment
AJAYZCHAOS 2/16/2012 10:20AM

    emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
CHEETARA79 2/16/2012 10:05AM

    Welcome to Onederland!

Please take your pegasus to the vet for a thyroid sonogram. I think it might have a goiter... emoticon

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
NUMD97 2/16/2012 9:41AM

    You're just adorable! What a GREAT way to start my morning! Thanks!

Report Inappropriate Comment
PASTPENDING 2/16/2012 9:20AM

    omg, I'm so glad I clicked this link. I needed to hear all of this...and you made me *actually* laugh out loud! I loved this!

Report Inappropriate Comment
BLOOMING52 2/16/2012 9:17AM


Report Inappropriate Comment
BECKY3126 2/16/2012 9:02AM

    As always LULU, you have brightened my day. Love, love, love the threatening of the scale. I am pretty sure I have done that....
Congrats on all of your success! You are one totally amazing chick!

Report Inappropriate Comment
SABLENESS 2/16/2012 8:45AM

    emoticon You are so right! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
RSWIFE 2/16/2012 7:57AM


Report Inappropriate Comment
CJMCCRAY 2/16/2012 7:23AM

    Great blog! I think you drew and excellent pegasus. Thank you for the inspiration.

Report Inappropriate Comment
PENOWOK 2/16/2012 6:54AM

    good going! Hang in there!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
KIMMYLOU4 2/16/2012 6:08AM

    This is so right on. We build things up and then they're not nearly as exciting as in our head. Loved all of the drawings, especially the check for Lots!

You're doing awesome. Tell your scale I said so. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DESIDERATA~GIRL 2/16/2012 5:40AM

    I loved your blog! You are so funny and the pictures are amazing! I totally agree with your ideas - I know that the number on the scales is not important and that how you feel about yourself, and how you look and feel in clothes is far more significant but I always forget! I've been stressing that I would have put on several lbs this week but I had surgery last Friday but need to remember that it's the long term that matters. Once I'm healed I need to start exercising carefully and do it to feel fit and get myself in better shape rather than stressing that I need to burn x amount of calories so I can lose y lbs by z. It's all relative!

Well done on all your hardwork! You are well on track!

Report Inappropriate Comment

Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

Log in to post a comment.
Member Comments Page (103 total):  1 2 3 Next >

Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.