Monday, January 30, 2012
In my last entry I shared how my brother and I do not get along. I normally get mad, hold my feelings inside until I blow. Well this time I am taking a different approach. My mother asked me today if I would be willing to counsel with our pastor. I was elated at the idea. She asked if I would tell the truth about everything. I agreed. Then after she wants my brother to meet with him to get his side. For the first time I am standing up to the bully in my life. i no longer want to hide my feelings behind food or a glass of wine. I am willing to take whatever I need to hear. His wife posted today on facebook that I am nothing but trailer trash. I purchased my first home when I was 19 years old. Please pray for me and that God will give me the strenght to not fold under pressure. My bloodpressure rises everytime something like this happens. This is something I finally have to do for myself, even if I fail. The men I date and work with also bully me. It is not their fault. It is mine. I was such a daddys girl that I never learned how stand up for myself. i get scared and cower in a corner. I don't exactly know how I came across spark people. It was totally by accident and I have not lost my weight but in reading some of the struggles others have gone through I have somehow empowered myself or I should say God is using sp to teach me valuble life lessons. Thank you all.