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    HANDSPK   15,110
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Where to start?

Monday, January 30, 2012

I last blogged at the end of September after turning 30 and feeling and in a bit of a third-life crisis. Apparently, I needed a good swift kick to make me appreciate my life more and since then, its been one dramatic health turn after another.

Now that things seem to be leveling out and I'm not a mess of constant pain and worry, I need to turn here for some love and support.

First, a brief recap of the last few months. I hate it when people go on and on about health stuff, so I'll keep it brief-- but maybe some people here can relate. First, in October, I herniated a disc very badly (just overnight) and was told by several docs that I would need surgery. Eventually, this has been helped dramatically with an epidural shot, oral steroids and aggressive physical therapy--but at the time, and for about 3 weeks--I was unable to do anything except lay flat on ice without blinding pain.

In the mean time, the combination of laying down a lot and being on the pill caused a bilateral pulmonary embolism (clots in my lungs putting pressure on my heart and breathing), a hospital stay, and a 6-month prescription for blood thinners. I'm incredibly lucky I didn't die. The doctor at the hospital told me they most often find these postmortem. Dear god.

But then the blood thinners combined with going off of the pill for the first time in 10 years caused extreme uterine hemorrhaging (I sincerely have never seen so much blood and my husband and I thought I was dying) which landed me in the hospital again.

Several months and a couple of procedures later, I'm okay again. Not myself, by a long stretch--but okay.

And here's where I need your help. I want to get back to being me. Depression and self-pity from all this and so much inactivity (I get winded easily and exercise now amounts to walking and doing back stretches) has caused some weight gain--about 10 lbs. And I need to stop that in its tracks! I want to eat healthier, exercise as much as my body permits and pull out of this slump. Okay, so I can no longer burn 500 calories at a time in Power Class or Spin. But I'm 30 years old and before all this I was strong! My body did what I wanted. I felt pretty sometimes and sexy sometimes and like I could accomplish what I wanted. I can get back there. I can build up to this. And I can take steps to feel good about myself in the mean time.

Here's my plan:

First, put myself on a natural and juice diet to get myself off of the cravings for processed foods. I find that if I can go cold turkey for about 2 weeks, I won't desire that stuff as much. So lean fish and chicken, beans, brown rice and as many fruits and veggies as I want for the next two weeks. nooothing processed--that means you, queso and pretzels!

Second, some new clothes. My wardrobe is getting seriously worn out. I need to look in my closet and find things that I'm happy to put on. During all this drama, I was called to be on a Grand Jury for two weeks over Christmas (nice timing, huh!?), which left me with about $300 of mad money that I am going to go SPEND!

Third, I'm putting my pedometer back on. I had to take it off for a while because the hundreds (yep, hundreds) of steps I was walking majorly depressed me. But I can make new goals now. No, I won't be able to hit 10,000 for quite a while. But if I walk a few more every day, I can have something to build on!

Fourth, make better use of the wonderful community here. I can blog during my lunch break, track to get back on track, and better support my friends here. Knowing I'm not alone in this is going to be really crucial, I think.

Okay, that's it for today. But you'll hear more from me soon!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

AHEALTHIERJESS 2/4/2012 9:47AM

    OH wow so glad you're OK! That is so scary. You will get back into it. You had to take care of yourself first health-wise before you can focus on losing weight, etc. Don't beat yourself up over it. You have a good plan in place and I know you can do it!

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JTAMSYN 1/31/2012 2:10PM

    So proud of you for not letting these horrible events get you down to the point of quitting. All I can say is baby steps! And your plan is proving that. There is no point in pushing yourself to the extreme and hurting yourself again. Be strong, I KNOW that you can do it!
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JUNEAU2010 1/30/2012 10:23PM

    I applaud your plan! It sounds do-able and it sounds as if you have put a lot of thought into it in a proactive and positive manner. I was talking with my stepmother the other day and she asked me when I had last gotten something new for my wardrobe. "You need something fresh." she said. I have not done anything yet, but I am thrilled that your jury money is going towards something that will make you feel better and, probably, lift your spirits.

Welcome back! WOOHOO!

Seriously, I hope you gain strength (emotional and physical) and just keep moving forward.

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MANLEYSANDY 1/30/2012 6:50PM

    I am so glad you are alright. That is some serious stuff!! Take it one day at a time, and the stronger you get the easier it will be!

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BUSYDAD1972 1/30/2012 12:58PM

    Sounds like a plan. I can relate with the back problems - can really set one back. You can do it one step at a time,
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MICKAELAP 1/30/2012 12:45PM

    I know when you have a downfall in your life. I have been their myself. It has taken me 6 yrs to get back on track, without feeling so tired all the time. Your body will tell you when your ready. The only thing is eat right, and exercise as much as possible. Your boddy will get use to it and will start liking the change. Don't give up, keep thinking positive and move forward. Good Luck;-)

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