"Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan "press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race"
Author: Calvin Coolidge
As my first "Sparkiversary" approaches, I am feeling much like I did a year ago - fat and uncomfortable and sort of out of control. This is a myopic view. It is easy to focus too much on food and weight. Being fat is a lot like being pregnant, without the joy - there is no setting it down. Everywhere I go, goes the weight. I have gained weight. I am not sure how much weight I have gained because my scale is broken. I found out my scale is broken by standing on it this morning and having it show that I have gained 18 lbs in 2 weeks. You can imagine my reaction. I then asked my youngest son to stand on it for me, just so I could see if it was just me, and, sure enough, it gave his weight as shockingly high as well. Honestly, I think it was probably good for me to get that little jolt. January tends to be a tough month for me, and this one has not been an exception. Illnesses (my son, then me), snow days followed by hideous wind/rain storms, etc etc. As I type this, I can feel myelf making excuses. So, as I sit here feeling like a giant, overfilled water balloon, I remind myself that, no matter how tired I am of making the same stupid mistakes, the same compulsive choices, it really boils down to two things: give in or press on. Well, since I did not title this blog "give in" you have probably guessed my choice is "press on". What does "press on" actually look like, in a practical sense?
1. complete today's "nutritional tracker" - the good, the bad, and the unneccesary
2. set my alarm for tomorrow's 5:45am workout, and set out my workout clothes&shoes
3. do a few more chores before turning in early
4. post this blog
5. spend some time connecting with Sparkfriends by reading their blogs
6. stop eating for tonight - I am uncomfortably full and I simply don't need ANY more food until tomorrow
7. drink lots of water
8. sit still for a few minutes and cope with any discomfort, physical or emotional, that crops up-food won't fix it, and discomfort won't kill me or permanantly harm me - it will pass and overeating will only make it worse, anyway
9. spend the time to get my youngest child off to bed in a good fashion - helping with homework, reading, saying prayers, tucking him in - and being patient in the process
10. letting go of the shame of being such a struggler in this area - it's embarrassing, it's tiring, and it's so tempting to only blog when I am doing well but if I adopt that rule, I sure won't be blogging a lot.
I thank you. in advance, for taking the time to read this, and for whatever patience you can summon up (though I don't blame you if you read my blogs regularly and are just annoyed - I know how annoyed I am with me). Either way, I will press on.......