Reflections that probably only make sense to me
Monday, January 23, 2012
My oh my how fast the months add up. Needless to say this pregnancy is not going how I thought it would. But i've had many months to figure out why. However its a little late to fix what I screwed up in the first trimester.
I know that the one big mistake was not easing into maintenance mode. Maintenance is a very very hard thing and I was NOT prepared for it in any way. Which led to me turning to junk food to fill the extra calories. Which in turn caused me to gain way too much way too early.
I had managed to get my body fat pretty low and then I threw a whole bunch of yucky fatty calories at my body. My body was like OH YEAH we know what to do with these! Lets hold on to them and never let them GOOOOO!
I was so use to exercise being my everything. I always threw myself into it. Everyday, twice a day. Then a baby was put into my mix. And although in the beginning I still tried to keep it up I just couldn't. Because I knew that it was no long just me i had to think about someone else as well. NOW if I had only took that mentality with my food as well. And because I had to moderately exercise I just kind of stopped. I didn't know how to do things half way.
So fast forward 7 months. Im at 2o2lbs now which is 44lbs up from my all time lowest. And about 30lbs up from my first OB appt. I could have tried harder but I didnt. And im sure this all sounds like the ramblings of a crazy pregnant lady. Not much of it makes sense but it gives me something to look back and reflect on later.
Anyway Im going to try and keep going to the gym at least 2 x a week. Im going to try and lift weights at home every other day. The flabby, jiggly bat wings that have found their way back to my arms are really starting to gross me out.
And let me tell you one thing when this is all over and I am back to 158lbs I WILLLL appreciate it a hell of a lot more. I remember still thinking I was so fat then. NEVER EVER EVER will I think that again!
So 11 weeks left till baby arrives then a good 6 weeks before I can jump back into what I think of as normal. Or at least that how im hoping it goes.