PROGRESS AND NOT RELENTING...
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Yesterday I met with a personal trainer. I have had a trainer before, which was very expensive, and I didn't gain anything from it because I was not ready. I guess I didn't want it badly enough.
But Danielle, she is good. She's smart, she's kind, she's understanding and I HOPE she can kick my butt. If she doesn't, I'll ask her to. Lol. If I am going for it, it's going to be 100%. I've always said I would be a good Biggest Loser contestant because I really push hard in the gym. I love working out! I just hate getting my lazy butt off the couch! But if I push myself to GET to the gym, I know I'll have a good workout. That said, even though Danielle is a petite little lady (size 0, in fact) she definitely inspires me. She was born with cerebral palsy and even though she only has about 30% movement and strength in her left arm/hand and one of her legs has a bit of a drag to it, she never let it get her down. She used to have a good job in business management but she wanted to help others overcome their obstacles and so she got in shape and went for her personal training certification. And she's a runner! Oddly enough, though physically we are opposite, we connect on that "we've got something to prove to the world AND ourselves" level.
In the past my husband has always WANTED me to lose weight, but was never really willing to be very supportive. By that I mean, he would get me a membership to a gym, but give me a hard time if I didn't use it much. But other than that, no other support or concern. It was about the money, not me. Same with the jogging stroller and elliptical machine. Yes, he has spent alot. But it always came with warnings about how much I had to use it to make it worth the money. Money, money, money. And my looks. This makes him sound very shallow and in truth, he's not. But I suppose when your wife tells you for over a decade she wants to lose weight and she never does, well, it can be disheartening.
I have talked to him about health concerns and he never seemed tuned in and interested in what I had to say. He was more attracted to me when I was working out and eating better and lost 45 pounds (and he says it wasn't only because of the weight but because of how attractive my confidence and hard work were to him). But then once I gained that weight back in pregnancy, well, he lost that appreciation and even concern.
Yesterday I called my husband to tell him about my training session with Danielle and her suggestion that I have one session a week. But holy smokes - it's $120 a month! Of course, he's been working out once a month with her and it's helped him to get a little direction in his strength training. So when I told him what she said he told me about how he felt a little selfish that he's the one with a trainer when I am the one who needs so much help and accountability. He said he's been thinking about it alot and since he wants to be married to me the rest of our lives (almost 13 years and going strong!) we HAVE TO get me healthy no matter what it takes. So he said I could get 2 sessions a month with her and just follow the routine she gives me until the next session. I was floored. I almost cried. He's not very open about his concerns or thoughts very often. I thought for sure he'd say no point blank. Then today I told him I was going in to fill out paperwork with Danielle and he told me he that he thinks I need to sign up for once a week and get some success under my belt with her encouragement and guidance. That he needs me to get healthy NOW before I end up on insulin or having open heart surgery or some other obesity complication.
Okay. I now have a trainer! I've been working out almost every day (missed when I worked out too hard and needed a day off). Today Danielle suggested I use the Spin Bike. Okay, I really like it but MAN my butt bones hurt! Just sayin... Anyway, I did 35 minutes of a spin routine, rode over 9 miles and burned 350 calories in that time. Good workout! And tomorrow I will do the circuit strength training routine she gave me. Oh yeah, and I stopped at a sports store and picked up a gel seat for the spin bike so that I can't use the seat as an excuse not to do it again.
Danielle kept saying I am a 10. Highly motivated, ready to go, ready to work hard. She is right. For a while I was kind of depressed because I felt like that mentally tough, relentless girl, who used NO EXCUSES back in 2009... well, I wasn't sure where she was hiding. And a few times I thought she was back and then it was very short lived.
That's not what I am experiencing now.
This is real.
She is back.