Thursday, January 12, 2012
I feel as if I'm taking a course in dieting. Not Dieting 101 because I've been a dieter unsuccessfully for 40 years. This is grad school and I nearly dropped out during the holidays.
I did so well on the 17DD that I started getting smug. Like an A student who thinks they're smart enough not to have to do the work. I learned from being on this diet that my body doesn't react well to gluten yet what did I do over the holidays? Yup, overindulge in foods with wheat and sugar. I thought "Well, I'll only go off for a couple of days at Thanksgiving". After all, I made stuffing with whole wheat bread! Well, a couple of days turned into looking at the scale on Jan. 2nd and being irritated with myself that I gained back 12 pounds in a little over a month and I was back up over 300 lbs. where I swore I would never be again.
My irritation at myself didn't last long because I knew that I had learned a valuable lesson. The lesson is that I have to keep doing the work and I can no longer use certain foods as a reward. I can't reward myself with pizza - that's like giving an alcoholic a glass of champagne for remaining sober for 6 months. I can't say that I have been so good on my diet that I deserve a homemade cookie (even if I did make them with WW flour and xylitol). One cookie leads to two, which leads to three... well, I am sure you can relate. It's that slippery slope. I can't take a break from doing all the other things that motivate me and keep me on track like meditations, visualizations, mindful eating, etc.
I am fortunate that unlike other times, I got right back on track, because I know what works and what I need to do to make it work. Let's just say I took a semester break and I'm back in the classroom. I didn't drop out. I realize now that I have to stay constantly on my toes. If this is truly a lifestyle change, then I have to imprint that in my brain. I can never go back to eating highly processed foods unless I want to lose all progress made. I have to continue to daily do the things that keep me motivated - no skipping class.
I am committed to eating healthy and I am glad for the continued support of my team members; without Sparkpeople I doubt that I would have gotten back on track, despite the fact that the diet works. It's not just the food we put in our mouths, but all the other tools and techniques we utilize that will make us a success story. I have a long way to go to graduate, but I think I got a passing grade on my first semester.