Thursday, January 12, 2012
This week has been filled with lots of activity and emotions. I am trying my hardest not to turn to food so I am hoping that by writing this blog it will be a different outlet for my emotions so that I can deal with what is going on instead of stuffing my emotions down with food. Its a step in the right direction, I think.
So lets start off with the good.....
On Monday night my parents made it home safely from their trip to Jamaica over Christmas break, sounds like they had a great time but Dad (who is kind of a homebody like me) was definitely happy to be home.
After work on Tuesday I got to meet one of my SP friends Deanna in real life. She is a very kind and genuine person. I was amazed how similar we are even though we are at different stages of our journeys. We made plans to go walking on Saturday, I am so looking forward to that.
This week I have worked out for at least 30 minutes everyday. I am so proud of myself and I feel so much better. It is really amazing how working out on a regular basis can change how you feel. It also made me wonder why is it so easy to make excuses for not exercising when it really does make you feel better??? Who knows! I have made a decision this year to adopt the "No excuses" mentality from this seasons Biggest Loser. We can't expect change if we make excuses. Its not going to be easy, in fact changing my life is probably going to be the hardest thing I have ever done, but the rewards will be amazing. I want to feel strong, be healthy, be confident and be released from the prison that I am currently in.
Now the not so good....
I forgot to set my alarm on Tuesday night so Wednesday I had only 30 minutes to shower, make and eat breakfast and get ready for work. Its amazing how that one thing can just mess up your whole day. When I finished tracking my food for Wednesday I had stayed within calorie range and I made it to Curves and 30 minutes on the treadmill after work. I was proud because the old me would not have made up the missed morning work out!!
Now the bad...
So I was on the phone with my Dad last night talking about how their trip was and if they had gotten used to the time difference again. He told me that my Grandpa had called them earlier in the evening and that he was diagnosed with prostate cancer just before Christmas. Yep that's right the big C word. I was shocked. At this time I don't know many of the details as my Grandpa is going to meet with the Doctors today and said he would call my Mom this evening with more information. So I am trying not to get to worked up until I know more. However, that is proving more difficult than it should be. My Grandma passed away about 2 1/2 years ago and since then my Grandpa has not taken very good care of himself and he misses her SO much. So my fear is that he will not fight to get better. Plus I am worried about the effect that this will have on my Mom, as she still misses her Mom on almost a daily basis and now her Dad is sick.
Normally when I get this kind of information I turn to food but I have resisted the call of food so far and I am trying to find a new outlet, a healthier outlet for my emotions or stress like blogs or exercise. I am not saying I won't slip up, I am not perfect and I never claimed to be. But I am really trying to not let my emotions derail me from my long term goal of getting healthy.
So that has been my week so far.