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    SONGBIRDPAULA   61,358
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The 1st meal I overate since October 2011


Monday, January 09, 2012

Well, it happened. Friday night was the night of the horrible episode. I had felt so wonderful and "capable" on my journey since October 2011 of not overeating a single meal. I was on a roll of "correctness" in eating my meals. That is not to say that since I started at my peak of 350 lbs I had not overeaten at any one time. I did and recovered from it and continued on, but this time it felt different. It was like I had let myself down. I had failed. I had not learned anything during these 2 1/2 years on my weight loss journey. I don't understand why it hit me so hard. I was going along Friday like my usual day and my husband and I had a night to ourselves, which is very unusual. We thought we would do something different and order take home Mexican food. I love the flavors, but have been able to eat the right way since October. I ordered a taco salad served in a very large fried tortilla bowl. I took the first bite, the second bite and so forth until I looked down and it was all gone including 1/3 of the tortilla bowl. I honestly can't seem to remember eating it! I'm crazy I guess! When I realized what I had done, shame filled me so that I was really down until Sunday morning (yesterday) and didn't care if I ever ate anything at all again. I planned to not eat anything for 2 days to make up for it. As the day went along, I was sitting in my recliner thinking and feeling sorry for myself and it came to me. My plan of redemption was very foolish and not safe either. I decided that I had come to far to mess up now. Right then and there I made a vow to myself that I will never again "fail" myself due to overeating a meal and that it will probably happen again as I'm not perfect! I can't allow my emotions I was feeling to attack me into being foolish. I am a person who is working everyday to become more healthy and become a new me. I have learned now through this experience that I will take each day as a new day, each day is the first day of the rest of my life.

Paula emoticon
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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
KIEODD 6/16/2012 12:15AM

    i know this post is old, but i'm starting my journey and i have trouble over eatting. I just do a couple more minutes of exerise afterwards and the next day be careful about what i'm eatting. hope thats help!

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ZANNBEE 2/20/2012 10:46AM

    Good for you for realizing that. We are not perfect. Only He is. God extends grace to us and I think it's important to extend grace to ourselves. You were relaxing and enjoying a night with your hubbie. That's OK. You are making choices and keeping on track.
My hubbie is naturally thin and even he can over eat sometimes. The difference is that the next day he just waits till he's hungry till he eats next time or he eats less the next day. No guilt, no shame etc. Some one else once said to me, "I have overeating days but I no longer have "overeating weeks".

You are doing great.

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SYN-CA 1/20/2012 10:01AM

    Paula, don't beat yourself up so much girl! We all have a day or meal or two where we take a little time off our our routine and indulge a bit. If you don't, you might not stay on the program! And, you really didn't overeat, just finished the meal presented to you! When I am having a weak moment, I will ask for half to be boxed so I won't be tempted. When it is in front of me, it's MINE! hahaha. Besides, Mexican food is so delicious, how could you have possibly left part of it??? Keep smiling!

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DONEWITHJUNK 1/13/2012 10:14AM

    I overate last night and had the entire Freschetta pizza instead of half of it as planned ... ironically, I was still within my calories and everything, but I felt so gross when working out and disappointed in myself. So I can understand how you feel and just not wanting to feel mindless about what you are doing or eating or feeling gross and disappointed later.

So thanks for sharing and keeping on! emoticon

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CANDACE28 1/9/2012 9:19AM

    You have the right motivation! You can exercise too. If you feel you have eaten tyo much. You can simple do a little exercise and it can take away some of those calories!


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