Sunday, January 08, 2012
I saw my cousin Brandy last night for the first time in about a year and a half. Growing up I was always the reserved one. Quiet, shy, kept to myself, didn't let loose. As an adult I've been pretty much the same way. I like to go out and have a good time - but I like that good time to revolve around my close-knit family and friends. I'm not the outgoing type and I'm ok with that :)
So, last night Brandy, Carl, Aaron, Nicole, Becky & Mitch came to the casino where I work. I greeted them while they were eating at the buffet, gave them some comps, chatted for a few seconds then had to be on my way to run a prize drawing.
After I got off work I joined the group at the bar. My cousin Brandy looked at me and said 'Shell there is something new about you! I don't know what it is, I can't put my finger on it, but you have got some CHARISMA! You are so different! You look really happy and I don't know... something has just changed!'
Truth be told - when I approached their table in the buffet I was scared sh##less! But I put on a big smile and gave a grand greeting anyway. Maybe it was a little fake :) I love my cousins, but we've grown apart in the past 20 years so it was hard for me to put myself out there.
The really great thing about this is - I can't get Brandy's words out of my mind. I approached the group last night with the confidence and self-esteem I gained when I lost 80 pounds. I approached them with the attitude I had when I felt good about myself. Although her words may not have been 100% warranted (enter brave smile here) I still can't shake the feeling that I want to feel that way 100% again! It's amazing how one person's perception of you can make you see things differently. I know I can achieve my goals again. Brandy is going to help me do that - and she doesn't even know it :)