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    DEARFACE   23,690
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Stress journal #1 (plus my hot yoga experience)

Thursday, December 29, 2011

I actually don't feel all that stressed, but my body is telling me otherwise.

Tuesday I decided to finally accompany a friend to hot yoga. Beforehand I felt a headache developing, which isn't unusual, and I even felt a little nauseous, but I thought that must just be my nerves about trying something new - and I knew I didn't want to bail on this friend and hot yoga yet again, so I was determined to go. I even started the January Jumpstart challenge earlier that day (which now I think may've triggered the headache).

We went to hot yoga - 30 minutes of waiting for everyone to get signed in and settled (frustrating) and 80 minutes of yoga at 100 degrees with 40 other people - packed so that I keep getting hit, hitting someone, or just can't focus on myself because I'm not sure what I'm doing and don't want to keep running in to other people. Also I tried a little yoga before on the Wii Fit and a beginner SP Yoga video - and hated it. But I know I need to get back in shape and work on my balance and flexibility for derby. And I know my knee is still injured but I should still work it.

Lots of things were knee based, so a bit uncomfortable. A lot of things were fast-paced and not explained, and a lot of things felt really cheesy. A few times I had to take extra breaks for water and to rest - I was NOT going to pass out here. Also I had drank A LOT of water through out the day to prepare and made sure my last "meal" was over 3 hours ago (I researched this on the site beforehand). I must note that I already drink a ton of water as it is.

So, I made it through hot yoga - teetering from not bad to this is okay to I can do this to "how much time is left?" Once done, my friend asked me how I felt and if I liked it. As politely as I could I said "It was okay" My friend looked so hurt!

I thought the heat would help my headache and body - but it didn't really change. As we walked to the car and talked about eating my belly was uneasy - I thought it'd been 4-5 hours since I last ate, so I must need food. We hit up drive thru sushi (trust me it's good) and as we waited for our order, I felt worse and worse. I was getting to the point that if I kept talking I was going to throw up - but I didn't want to say that. So I kept trying to be polite and nodding my head and throwing in "yea" and "uh huhs" in the conversation while never making eye contact because I had to hold my head a certain way for any relief.

I felt terrible not participating in conversation because I'm normally such a great conversationalist, and I haven't hung out with this friend in such a long time. This friend is also an incredible nervous driver - with lots of slow speeds and random, paranoid stops! When you just want to get home and throw up, that's not what you want. I finally told her "I need to not talk because if I keep talking I'm going to throw up" So that helped for a while, but then my friend kept talking - and I eventually had to say "Yea, I do need you to pull over" So I could throw up all the water and all the food I had that day, at a bus stop.

So I finally got into my house to a moody boyfriend, locked myself in a hot shower with the shower head streaming down on my temples as much as possible. Once out - much more vomit. I couldn't make it to pajamas. Just sweat pants, robe, and towel on my head. Alternating from a pitch black, quiet bed (bf had to sleep on the couch because he needs the TV on to sleep) to running back to the toilet to vomit. Any light or even sound made me vomit. I've never, ever, had a migraine that intensely terrible.

Beyond that, I've started my period, which makes my body feel terrible, and I've got another round of trench mouth - which is basically ulcers in your mouth/gums with lots of irritation, inflammation and general uncomfortableness. I feel like my gums are rebelling and going to tear off. I hate it. And I wish it were just a "oh yea you should brush and floss" sort of thing but truth is we regularly brush and floss every day - so I know it's not that.

BLOAHAHAHA.

So my body is stressed and hates me. Boo.
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