Well hello there.
Happy Holidays, by the way, whatever you celebrate. Here's hoping 2012 is better than 2011.
To quote a song I really like... it's been a while. Too long, really. I'd love to tell you that I've been keeping up with everything and just not posting, but that would be a lie. There are a lot of reasons that I disappeared, from boredom to embarrassment- I wasn't progressing, I knew I wasn't progressing, and I was mortified posting the same basic message every week: "Nothing's changed, I suck, blah blah blah." So I just stopped doing it. Eventually, I stopped weighing myself as well. That's never a good sign.
The good news is that I really haven't gained any weight over my break. The last weigh in I believe I was 177, and when I got on the scale yesterday, it said 178 even. That needs to be taken with a grain of salt due to monthly timing, but still. I didn't really move much either way. That's an accomplishment in and of itself when everyone tells you how hard it is to maintain. Honestly, I don't think it's that hard. I'm doing the same things I've BEEN doing, at least with the food. More or less. I'm not saying I'm perfect or anything by any stretch, but I certainly haven't gone back to my old ways food wise. It really just reinforces that this is a LIFE CHANGE, and a sustainable one at that. I can make healthier food choices even when I'm not doing anything else.
Working out... not so much. ^_^;;; But that was true before I disappeared, too.
So what's been going on since I last wrote? A lot of the same. Work is crazy this time of year. I'm procrastinating on starting community college applications. I do want to get them done and over with before I have to start dealing with FAFSA stuff, so I can't put them off too much longer. Soon. There is also the possibility of a visit to Japan in the spring... though that depends a lot on finances and what happens between now and the deadline at the end of February, so we'll see. I'm trying to not get my hopes up too high.
Basically, I need to find the Spark again. This is made more difficult in that it wasn't just one solid thing that sparked me in the first place. It was a build up of things, really. A timely realization right when I'd gained eight pounds. I mean, this started off with me trying to lose those eight pounds- and if I lost more, then yay. We're about 50 pounds later, so a definite YAY. Even if I never lose another pound, I've accomplished something huge.
I lost my motivation along the way. Well... okay, I know exactly when and how I lost it, to be totally fair. I've been limping along the past year and a half, trying to pretend that I hadn't -totally- lost my mojo. Knowing the hows and whys doesn't help bring it back, though.
First things first, though- I need to start journaling weekly again (even if it IS just to say "nothing's changed"), and weighing myself. Water hasn't been bad, but there's still room for improvement. Vitamins need to improve- ESPECIALLY the multi and the D, because I've been really tired lately. I need to start going to bed at a decent hour (for me) so I can get up and work out before I go to work... since we established some time ago that if I don't do it before work, I just don't do it. One step at a time. Baby ones. I have some things in line, I just need to slowly work on the rest of it again, that's all.