Thursday, December 22, 2011
Just wanted to pop in and wish my friends and everyone else a Merry Christmas.
Lord willing you will be seeing more of me in the new year. I went with my family to the McWane Science Center in Birmingham to carry my grandson and saw myself in several mirrors. I hated the way I looked! I am huge! I do not like that at all. I have never been this big in my life. With God's help, I will lose this weight and get into better shape. I was exhausted after spending a few hours walking all over that place. I will feel so much better when I do this. I have recently been reading where there is no such thing as 'willpower'. It is God's power that will help me be the best I can be. I have to stop sabotaging myself by eating unhealthy foods and also by not exercising. I have to stop making excuses. No one can do this but me and my Lord. No one made me this way, but myself. I didn't get this way overnight even though sometimes it seems as if I did, and I know I can not lose this weight overnight.
It is sad when one knows what he/she has to do, but not love himself or herself enough to do anything about it. I know what I have to do, but doing it is another thing all together. I must find an alternative to emotional eating. My emotions have been all over the map during the past few months. I have days where I cry at a drop of a hat. I get irritable over the smallest things, and that is not good. I will be spending more time with Jesus and reading my Bible to overcome this.
Please pray for me during this time. I am tired of being so wishy washy and not taking care of myself. I don't only need a new mindset, but a new heartset. My son is getting married in March, and I don't want to be this fat. Yes, I am morbidly obese according to the doctor. I am tired of seeing those words in my records. I will change: for the better or the worse. It has to be for the better, Lord. Please help me. I need you in the worst way, Lord. I give you my all.
Love you all,
Have a Merry Christmas and enjoy time with family and friends. JESUS IS THE REASON FOR THE SEASON.