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    FROGGGY13   17,864
15,000-19,999 SparkPoints

... in which I whine

Saturday, December 10, 2011

i wonder why I need so much external validation for this project, among others. It has suddenly really started bothering me that nobody at work has said anything about my noticeable loss - 8 kg for a 1.57 cm tall person is quite a lot! Maybe it's the culture here; I mean, I am well liked at work, but people don't really discuss their personal lives much with work colleagues. Also, I don't actually have a team, as I am mostly independent, though I do interact with a bunch of people quite closely. I miss the friendships I've had with my previous teams.

Why do I care? My husband has certainly noticed, and I feel a lot better in my physical being. I know I'm healthier. Why do I mind one way or the other what my colleagues say or don"t? On the flip side, nobody ever comments that somebody gained weight, either, and especially not to women who are still in their childbearing years.

Why is this important to me? Isn't the actual result enough? Am I really so vain?

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
FRANCESCANAZ 12/11/2011 6:18PM

    Woman you are so vain you probably think this comment is about you, don't you? emoticon You are probably only slightly more beautiful than you were before the weight loss and so that is why no one has commented. Enjoy your success. You worked hard for it! emoticon

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THETURTLEBEAR 12/10/2011 5:10PM

    People always worry about embarrassing others or being wrong when they comment on weight. I had to lose 50 pounds before people mentioned it, and even then, they often didn't.

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HEALTHIER_K 12/10/2011 12:17PM

    I agree with Kriszta11 -- some people won't want to say anything like "Did you lose weight? You look great!" because they're worried about implying that you were big before or looked bad before.

Congrats on the loss! :)

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MOBYCARP 12/10/2011 9:29AM

    Did you lose the weight relatively quickly? The first couple of comments I got from people who noticed expressed concern that I might be sick. If people are thinking the drop in weight might be related to a health problem, they could feel that commenting would make you feel worse.

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ONEKIDSMOM 12/10/2011 7:26AM

    Maybe "vain" is not the right word. Seeking a feedback of "it's OK, this is a positive change" might be buried deep inside. Bottom line, though, is that this initiative to be healthier is for YOU, not for the attention / approval of others. And you're worth it.

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KRISZTA11 12/10/2011 5:30AM

    Surely they have noticed, even 4-5 kg is clearly visible - so I guess it is the culture.
Maybe the don't want to indicate indirectly that you were overweight before, or they find it intimidating to comment on something so personal as weight.
Congrats again to your fantastic weight loss!
It is somewhat different in our office. People notice weight loss and compliment, but never say anything about weight gain.
This seems more natural to me (getting compliments is always good), but the approach in your office seems more fair: body weigh has nothing to do with work...

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RORYLYONS 12/10/2011 3:43AM

    The only one that should matter is dh...That should bring a huge emoticon ... emoticon on your weight loss.

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REDSHOES2011 12/10/2011 3:20AM

    Your husband noticed and that's all that should count..

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