I have had a really tough time recently, have lost 3 elderly family members and a childhood friend in the last month - I have finally understood the source of my weight gain - I binge to deal with my feelings because I don't know how to deal with them any other way. I saw myself eating more and more, huge portions of unhealthy food to help ease the pain I was/am feeling.
I am slowly weaning myself off the junk food - and looking for ways to get back on track one step at a time, because I feel heavy, lethargic and a mess. ugly and huge and everything else feels small - spaces are smaller, chairs feel tiny - every move I make feels elephant like and I HATE it!!!
I have made changes in my life recently, changes that are exciting but also stressful.
I finally had enough of my job, where I live and feeling stuck - I was getting nowhere with my job - I attempted to adapt my role to incorporate my skills, to no avail.
I decided that I needed to change, a fresh start, to gain my independence and actually be an adult.
Moving away was first on my list - I chose the city where I teach at the academy to cut out all my travelling time and costs and be close to friends and bigger cities for work and for things to do.
I have found a flatshare, which is going to be amazing - the flat is beautiful and as there is only two of us living there it won't be crowded.
I aim to move at the end of January and I am handing in my notice at the end of December - I have told work and the person I support what I am doing so there is now no turning back!
I am excited and terrified at the prospect of moving away for the first time - uni doesn't really count for me as I was only away for 8 months and was completely supported by student loans etc this time I am supporting myself.
I also have a networking event to go to tomorrow having been invited by the CEO of a local film company. fingers crossed it goes well!
so I have done it, I have made the changes I said I always wanted to. I know I have support and love to make this work and I hope that things go well.
I will have a gym at the end of my road so no excuses for not working out! plus no-one to rely on for lifts and no extra finances for cabs/taxi's - buses will be my new best friend along with walking haha!
anyway - thank you for your support - I feel empowered that I am changing my life and I have showed myself what I can do when I commit to something - that is scary and out of my comfort zone - now to transfer that to my health journey!