Saturday, October 22, 2011
This has been a crazy year for me and not much weight loss has happened. In fact until recently a bit of weight was gained, but life has been lived. I have been re-losing some weight that I gained this year the last few months.
I went to Paris this year and it was beautiful. I bought a new Anthropologie dress for everyday I was in Paris. Airplane seats are more comfortable now than when I weighed over 300 pounds. I walked all day when I was there, but I also ate bit too much cheese and bread and drank a bit too much wine.
I completed a marathon a few weeks ago, and that felt good. It was hard, but very rewarding emotionally. Less than five years ago, I weighed over 300 pounds and got winded walking around the block... and I did flippen 26.2 miles baby! That felt good.
Other things happened this year too. I got a promotion at work. I have been called beautiful by cute boys this year. I have almost gotten divorced twice this year... and I still think that is viable option. It hasn't been a good marriage, but we're giving it one last shot.
I think when people accomplish massive weight loss (160 pounds was lost) it does something to them psychologically. For me, it made me realize that I can accomplish things, anything I want, and I don't want to waste anymore time being unhappy. I want to soak up all life has to offer. I want to bask in the sunlight. I want to laugh until my stomach hurts. I want see all the things I missed seeing while I was hiding out in my house at 300 plus pounds. I want to dance. I want to run. It helped me feel like I am capable of caring for myself. It made me want to live my life to the fullest and not settle for less than I feel I deserve or am capable of.
Now amongst all this living and fun (not everything this year was fun)... I drank a bit too much and went out to too many dinners... and now I am ready to display a little more self control again. Life is about balance. I went a long time without having much fun... and I over did the fun this last year. So here I am back tracking my food and exercise again. I am turning 40 in seven weeks. Darn it, I am going to lose as much as I can before my birthday and I hope to lose the rest and finally reach my goal shortly after that.
Aww... balance :)