First, I'd like to apologize to anyone following my 10 week blog on baby steps for losing weight. I never put the last two weeks down (here or on my coaching site) for a few reasons, but mainly because I was thinking about taking my blogging in a different direction. Or if anyone had been waiting with bated breath for the last two entries, I'm sorry that they never appeared.
Next, my reason for blogging today. I'm currently doing a challenge on the "50 pounds" team. It's exactly the amount of weight that I still want to lose, so I was happy to find the team, and very serious about losing weight.
I'm also very depressed about it, and this morning, I think I realized why. I still have a love affair with my old habits and lifestyle. So I'm frustrated by TWO things: 1) That I'm so overweight and 2) That the only way to lose the weight is a sincere, dedicated, permanent change in my lifestyle.
I think I'm in mourning for my past life. I went through this once before — when I realized I would be forever on medication for my thyriod (Hashimoto's disease). It took a while to accept it, but when I did, life was very different.
I facilitate a course in creativity, and one of the biggest blocks to creativity is to always try to be in control. And one of the biggest ways to open up to creativity is acceptance.
So here I am in my personal life, and I see that, just as in creativity, it will be acceptance of my current state and acceptance of the lifestyle I have to adapt and own that will lead me to successful weight loss.
I'm happy to have started on the "alternative" challenge, as it consists of "baby steps" that I think I need to take to prepare for the rest of the actions that will be necessary. I need to journal my food, exercise and water everyday (something that had been part of my life not too long ago, thanks to my "weekly journey" blog). And I am supposed to blog once a week.
Here's that blog! Today, I also am going to be polishing up some affirmation and intentions that I want to read every day and night. I also want to set up a new and more exciting (and challenging) exercise routine.
So far, I'm off on a decent, if not perfect, start, as I have been journaling, but I don't always get everything down. So I have to work on that. And of course, writting my blogs.
I started at 190. I've been weighing in unofficially, and it's not good... I'm inching up a few pounds. I think I've been rebelling with food this week (that is, my mind doesn't really want to change, and it's going in a bad direction in response). But I think today's blog has cleared my mind, and I'm heading again in the right direction.
As always, good luck to everyone on their journey to weigh loss and fitness!