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    BARBARA_BOO   122,924
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Ate the Whole Motherlovin' Thing!


Friday, August 12, 2011

A thoughtful SparkFriend sent me two Wedding Cake Goodies, in honor of my upcoming September 1st 50th wedding anniversary. I think she felt sorry for me because I was whining a week or so ago about my disappointment that I hadn't lost the amount of weight I had wanted to lose and was way off on my predictions of what I would weigh on September 1st.

"What did we learn?"---Losing weight for special events is motivating and it works. However, it's a good idea to plan how you will handle disappointment, if you miss the mark, like I did.

After acknowledging that I had "whoopsies" fallen short, of my self-chosen goal, owning my mistakes, and fussing to my friends for a day (so I didn't have to stew about my predicament alone), I got back with it.

After all, it was one lousy little benchmark that was off, not my entire life. Fighting the desire for perfection is one of the stickier problems that has gotten in my face, in so many subtle ways, throughout this whole weight loss soap opera. Anyhoo, I readjusted my goals and am moving nicely past the self-doubts toward a more reasonable September 1st target. I am "kicking butt and taking names", a delightful descriptive phrase that builds a fire under me. I hadn't heard it in a while until I ran across it in a SparkFriend's blog. I love it!

But, I DIGRESS, like always.

Here's the story that prompted my blog title.

While determining what to do instead of eating both cakes in one sitting, like in the old days, I came up with a plan. I would send one to a friend, who has a wedding scheduled in April, and freeze the other one, layer by layer, so that i could make the enjoyment last longer than one day.

I could see myself with a cup of coffee and a reasonable portion or two (whatever the Spark Tracker says that is) when I want a special treat.

That plan reminded me of the time I ate the whole motherlovin' top layer of my daughter's wedding cake, foolishly left in MY freezer, for her 1st anniversary pleasure. She blames me for the failure of that marriage.

I seriously considered buying another cake and eating everything but the top, so I wouldn't get caught. But, what the frakkle!!!! I just owned up to it.

That was then, and this is now. I am kicking butt and taking names, as I am working to change the habits and self-talk that got me to "morbidly obese" several years ago. Now, I'm merely "overweight".

BTW, we will be running off to an undisclosed location, just like we did when we got married up. We want to avoid the sheet cake in the garage and the party our girls threatened to throw. We VANT to be alone. Yaah, we still do it.

When pics from our commemorative photo shoot become available, I will share them with YINZ all. I think we will have fun with the photographer. He does fashion photography, too.

Gotta go now. Date night.
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EDIT: A note to CATS
I have not only read about such shenanigans to hide the "crime", I have done them, but not with anything as big as a wedding cake, with all of those tiers. You are looking at a hardcore recovering emotional eater here.
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EDIT#2 For those who requested cake info

It's too late for a coverup eatfest now. So, please don't order me a replacement for the one I ate back in 1983. That being said, I believe it was a hazelnut cake with buttercream frosting. The bakery was Hartter's in Milwaukee. It was good grub. (On the flip side, it would probably balance things out if I were to mention the "Good Boy" Chocolate Drop incident. Not my favorite.) I still dislike being told to sit.

I'm not saying that I couldn't have eaten an entire wedding cake and left the top layer untouched, so that only I would have known what happened. I believe my reasons for fessing up were the expense of a replacement cake and the fact that I didn't want to "founder" myself on it and ruin cake for myself forever.

What's "founder", you ask? All I know is that's what my relatives in Tennessee called eating so much of a thing that you never wanted to eat it, see it, or even think about it, ever again. I have never been able to do that, in all honesty, so my concern on that score was really a waste.

EDIT #3 Child Bride
I was 19 on my wedding day and my "Sugarman" was 25. Thanks for the compliments. I clean up OK, for an old broad. I think you are responding to my "happy glow". I looked a lot older before I began the ongoing dance classes back in 2003, with between 80 and 90 additional pounds on me. "Being (here comes the F-word) FAT" does make most of us look old, I'm afraid.

EDIT #4 Doe in picture of my page's background
The doe is not a personal pet. It or one of its family does, however, eat our flowers daily. There are about 8 deer hanging out, winter and summer, in the wooded outlot behind us. We don't feed or encourage them. They have just decided they live here.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LEFTHANDLUKE 6/26/2012 10:51PM

    you are the queen of comedy emoticon

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DOGMOMMY 8/14/2011 10:12PM

    mmmmm... now I want cake! have had the munchies today and am trying hard to stay strong.... but now I got cake on my mind.... luckily there's none in the freezer, but I love the idea of freezing it in layers!! gonna have to try that - thanks for the idea!!!

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NIAGCHRIS246 8/13/2011 5:11PM

  Yes, you are definitely to blame for the failure of that marriage! I can't believe you ate your daughters cake top!
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Now here's what I would have done. I would have bought the second wedding cake telling myself I was going to throw the bottom away, then I would have eaten it! And the top too!
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emoticon Your daughter!

Is that your very own personal pet doe in the picture?

Comment edited on: 8/13/2011 5:14:25 PM

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MSPEACHYJONES 8/13/2011 8:15AM

    Great idea freezing the cake! Oh AND escaping for a romantic hideout for your anniversary emoticon Have a fantastic time!!

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WATERDIAMONDS 8/13/2011 8:05AM

    Hello Fearless Leader--and congrats on yet another Spark-tacular blog. LIke everyone else, I applaud your choice to adjust your thinking so that you move forward with your health plan.

But the point that jumps out at me most in what you've written is your thought that it's a good idea to plan how to handle disappointment when we miss a goal.

"After all, it was one lousy little benchmark that was off, not my entire life."

Yep. Outstanding. For me personally, beating back perfectionism is a major key to unlocking the many doors in the weight-loss mansion.

And although your tale of eating the top layer of the wedding cake makes me smile at the image of tiny Boo gobbling down all that butter cream, it also reminds me to appreciate how far we've come.

Because I, like you and so many others on Spark, lived that nightmare for too many frakkin' years.

It's good to be sane, isn't it?

I would say it's good to be sane AGAIN, but I don't think running out of my house at 11:30 almost every single night FOR TWO YEARS to buy replacement cartons of ice cream, and replacement jars of chocolate sauce and replacement bags of pecans and eating enough of each to go undetected for having snarfed them down after my family went to bed qualifies as sane in the first place, do you? (And nope, I never "foundered" about it. Not even once!)

Have a glorious Spark Saturday.

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ZURDTA- 8/13/2011 6:05AM

    emoticon

Great idea to freeze and enjoy... great willpower too...

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DDOORN 8/12/2011 10:14PM

    Love the story about your daughter's wedding cake...! Boy can I relate! I *know* I've been there, done that, but most "scenes of the crime" are quickly torched & forgotten like a Mission Impossible assignment...lol!

Congrats on having the willpower muscle to plan to keep your cake and parcel it out with such self-control! Whew!

Don

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HDHAWK 8/12/2011 8:46PM

    emoticon on your upcoming anniversary! You deserve to spend it any way you want. I would say 50 yrs. is quite a goal to reach!

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THISYEARSMODEL 8/12/2011 7:21PM

    You cannot POSSIBLY be old enough to have been married for 50 years! I thought maybe you were 50ish! (SP really needs an applause emoticon...)

Your battle may have taken a slight detour, but you haven't lost the war! I say a hearty congrats and well done, because it is an accomplishment no matter how you look at it. And you look great!

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EDIT: I confess to wanting to know what kind of cake, too...but no, on second thought let's not think about it.

Comment edited on: 8/12/2011 7:22:43 PM

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LIFEWALK 8/12/2011 7:09PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon LOL, I soooo get all of that! and kudos for the adjustments, changes & progress u r making :)

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CASSIES 8/12/2011 6:49PM

    Great post. Of course I want to know what kind of cake it is?!



I can't wait to see the photos.

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CAZ5346 8/12/2011 6:43PM

    YOU ARE SO CUTE. LOVED READING THIS BLOG. I'M OFF TO MILWAUKEE AGAIN TUESDAY FOR A SHORT VISIT WITH NEURO FOR DRUG STUDY. I STILL HAVEN'T NOTICED ANY DIFFERENCE IN MY SYMPTOMS GOOD OR BAD.

I HAVE BEEN CRAVING CAKE BUT KNOW IF I EAT ANY I WILL JUST FEEL SICK.

TAKE CARE

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CATSDONTPRAY 8/12/2011 6:33PM

    I refuse to believe that you are having a 50th wedding anniversary, because you couldn't be a day over 50!

I've actually read a lot of stories about people eating all of something, then buying another and eating all but what was previously left to hide what they did. Good for you for fessing up then, and making a plan now!

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NANCYLRAGS 8/12/2011 6:28PM

    Good for you!!!! Oh those were the days to eat and enjoy the whole thing! But we learn as we age.... and have to change. Nancy

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