Wednesday, August 10, 2011
I'm going to ramble so be forewarned. I joined SparkPeople two years ago and haven't changed a thing. Same whines, same sizes. WHAT is it going to take??? "If I can do it, you can." I hear that. Yet, why can't I be the one saying it? Well, here I go yet again. I work with a woman doing weight watchers. She has her support system which includes family and friends that go to the meetings together. She has lost 42 pounds thus far. Every week I hear everyone complimenting her and singing praises. I sit there feeling like a failure. How dare she go and lose weight and leave me behind in a melting pot of fat? My son. He has been on a health kick all this time too. He's lost quite a bit and not just eating better and/or right, but he is exercising. Works out just about everyday. If I started when he did, I'd be down 40 as well. But no...I grumble and mumble and hide the ice cream dishes. Yes, still "sneakin' snacks." So what...when. What has to happen for me to do something. I can't have anyone else do it for me. I've considered online Weight Watchers, but not sure I'd stick with it. What turns that switch on in someone when they finally begin their journey with success?
I got on the treadmill today. First time in months. Figured with summer here, the thought of working up a sweat too much to handle. But I did it. It's cooler in the basement anyway. I am so so tired of being the largest one every where we go. I'm getting older. Not much time left to look at least halfway decent. I can lose 40 now and look nice, but if I wait until I'm 80, I'm still gonna be ugly. Negative feelings today. I just hate being "left behind." I want the medal too!!