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Sneaky Little Saboteur

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Tuesday, August 02, 2011

I meant to blog about this Saturday, but haven’t had a chance until now. Saturday is weigh-in day for my 5% Challenge Team. I confess to a little nervousness each week. But my happiness/attitude is no longer determined by the scale, so it’s not so bad. Until this week--this week--I made a horrifying discovery. I still have some PreSparkSkeletons in my closet.

Remember All or Nothing Girl? The PreSparkShelli who would quit, if she messed up the slightest bit? Well, it wasn’t her. She’s doing a good job of staying banished to somewhere outside my calling area. No, this was someone I’d almost forgotten about. Someone far sneakier and way more subtle. This chick totally flies under the radar and is only visible if you use your peripheral vision. She is Saboteur Shelli and she’s nuttier than a fruitcake, which is saying something, considering all the possible Shellis available.

Saboteur Shelli appears when I’m close to a weight loss goal and she convinces me to sabotage myself. She’s so clever about it, I don’t even realize she’s there, until it’s too late. Here’s the set-up, I squeaked into Onederland last week. I knew it was hit or miss if I’d stay there this week, but I wasn’t too worried about it either way. At least, I didn’t think I was. But you know what Saboteur Shelli did?? She slowly and quietly convinced me that there was no way I could stay in Onederland, so I should go lax on the freggies, munch a couple extra bites of SunChips, be sloppy about tracking, eat lots of sodium the day before. Why should it matter, since I wasn’t going to make that goal, anyway? Might as well make sure it didn’t happen.

WHAT?? What the heck kind of logic is that?? I’m not a genius, but I don’t consider myself an idiot. Sadly, she worked her voodoo magic on me and I fell for it. As a result, I gained 2.2 pounds last week. Fortunately, SparkShelli was still strong enough not to freak out, not to speed dial All or Nothing Girl, not to (shudder) quit. But I had to stop and think about what happened. It’s so bizarre. And the really bizarre thing is, Saboteur Shelli only shows up around weight loss issues. That’s it. She stays out of my family, career, education, everything else. She seems quite happy for me to be successful everywhere BUT weight loss. How strange is that? I’m sure there’s a deep, psychological explanation, but I have no idea what that might be. Here’s one thing I DO know. If she only shows up in one area of my life, then I only have to kick her out of one area. So, I’m summoning all of my Super SparkGeek powers and going Green Lantern/Orange Spark on Saboteur Shelli, kicking her bootie all the way to the Lost Sector on the ruined planet Ryut.

In brightest day, in blackest night, no weight loss goal shall escape my sight. Let those who sabotage my fight, beware my power, SparkPeople’s light!

(It’s possible I’ve seen too many summer blockbusters lately, considering I just masking taped an orange construction paper mask to my face and posted it online.)
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    778 days ago
    we are on a similar wavelength— i called myself a emoticon super hero yesterday because i defeated my own Sneaky Saboteur— she was calling me to get french fries— i even went so far as to enter the 5Guys establishment. But, my superhero won out emoticon and i left without buying anything.
    on the way home i went to a vietnamese place to get vegetarian fresh rolls instead.

    a HUGE — emoticon MOMENT!!!!

    emoticon for all of your inspiration and humor.
    1458 days ago
    I could really relate to this blog! I have one of those villains in my life too. All or nothing girl. I am learning very slowly to not freak this time and not to let the scale control me. I am starting my 6th day and have done great all week. But will have to keep my eye out for the all or nothing girl too. Thanks for posting!
    2387 days ago
    Great blog! Loved the end!
    2394 days ago
    Love the mask
    2395 days ago
    Oh, yeah....I know this SS woman all too well! Keep up posted on how you outfox this jinx!
    2397 days ago
    Love this blog! Keep writing and "producing." emoticon
    2401 days ago
    I think most of us over weight women have a Saboteur Shelli in us. That is why for me I can never maintain a loss for very long before I start going the other way again. Sounds like a plan to kick her out for good. emoticon
    2401 days ago
    I totally have a sneaky Saboteur Sunny like that - in the ice cream aisle she whispers, "You are doing so well you have earned a little treat. Yes", I semi-stupidly say and buy coffee ice cream. I think I am on to her whiles! I buy ONE 6 OZ CUP of plain coffee ice cream, not a pint, quart or half or whole gallon; just 6 oz.! My strategy is working pretty well. There is not a big world of hurt in 6 ounces of plain ice cream, ONCE IN A LONG WHILE! emoticon

    I have some friends emoticon who sing a similar song, " You can't be good ALL the time, you need to have a treat now and then!" Have YOU noticed that none of those so-called friends are anywhere in the vicinity of 'normal weight'? emoticon I have.

    I just smile and ignore them. I won't let them 'give me permission' to have a treat right then and or anytime soon. I am determined to get my BMI below 25.
    2402 days ago
    I love your blogs and vlogs. Thanks for keeping me laughing. I must have my own version of saboteur shelli, as I was supposed to reach a 10 pounds weight loss goal today when weighing in at a work TOPS meeting, and what did I see but I gained a pound this week. I know it was my saboteur that caused me to eat the wrong things this past weekend (Applebees chix fettucine carbonara (but ooh soo good), Rita's water ice, and a couple of candy bars) Oh, why did I think it was alright to buy and eat those! Thanks for the awareness of this saboteur around me. I will send her far far away!
    2402 days ago
  • ALLEY2300
    I am loving your blogs! The struggles on this one remind me so much of myself! Glad i am not the only one!
    2402 days ago
    Love the Mask. Love the Blog.
    2402 days ago
  • DBBDANFORD I'm hooked...I'll be following you to whatever planet you came from. It's more fun then this one :)!!!
    2402 days ago
    Shelli - I think you're my alter-ego!

    2402 days ago
    You made me LMAO!
    2403 days ago
    Great blog
    2408 days ago
    This is a great blog. I've got a nasty saboteur sneaking around my life also!
    2410 days ago
    So after losing 102 pounds, I have lost it.
    And it is Saboteur Shelli's fault?
    Let me at her!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2412 days ago
    Had to laugh reading your blog! Keep going and don't give up, you are on the right track!! emoticon emoticon
    2413 days ago
    Go SparkGirl Shelli. You crack me up!

    Well now you know, keep a look out for that wacky, crazy Saboteur.
    2414 days ago
    I think we all have a saboteur lurking around, don't we? Send the Green Lantern my way!
    2414 days ago
    Got me laughing out loud! Love the mask!
    2414 days ago
    Hope you win this battle and all the following ones! Inner saboteurs are SO sneaky. glad you caught yours out! Keep strong.
    2417 days ago
    You are so funny!

    I have a SaboteurLauraine - I call her Laurie- who shows up sometimes. I learned to kick her butt. She can go after my weight but I keep after my fitness goals. Watch me soar right over her head!! My latest accomplishment is a sprint triathlon. I did it!! And I kicked her attempts to keep me from staying in onederland. Been there for more than 1.5 years. Just can't get below 180/179. But I fight with her over it!

    You go,girl!
    2417 days ago
    You are freaking funny!
    2417 days ago
    She lives in my house too! Her name is Saboteur Chris and she had been derailing me so much in the past I thought she'd taken up camp. Until something just clicked. I started training with a personal trainer and he helped me make a few adjustments. I just had finally had ENOUGH being heavy and wanted to DO something about it. I just thought, "Why NOT me?" "Why CAN'T I be thin? I deserve it too!" Just keep trucking along and things will keep going. Hang in there! You deserve to be thin too!
    2418 days ago
    I've met Saboteur Shelli - she a close cousin of Saboteur Laurie! I'm so glad she didn't get you down too much. Congratulations on getting yourself back on track.

    Laurie emoticon
    2418 days ago
  • LEXIE63
    ROFLMAO! So cool! Love the mask! LOLOL
    2418 days ago
    Attitude is everything and YOU GOT IT. I love your blog. Don't let Sneaky Shelli undermine your progress. Kick her butt to the curb, preferably on trash day. emoticon
    2418 days ago
    Love this - thanks so much for posting. I bet Saboteur Shelli is in cahoots with Whining Wendy. Thanks for inspiring me today!
    2419 days ago
    Hi! Thanks for the smile this morning... Maybe we should introduce Sabateur Shellie to Louse up Louise. Maybe they can kick each others booties!... and we can move on to success!

    Today is a new day for fresh beginnings!
    2419 days ago
    I love it! Orange construction paper and all... LOL! You have so got this one down! Way to go!

    2420 days ago
    Congratulations first on reaching ONEderland and second for recognizing these unhealthy "gremlins" who live deep inside of us and undermine our noble efforts.

    Don your superhero mask and go kick some demon heinie! emoticon
    2420 days ago
    You can do it!! emoticon emoticon
    2421 days ago
  • LINDAJ0621
    Too funny... emoticon
    2421 days ago
    OMG! I love your blogs but the last sentence of this one had me rolling on the floor. You always bring a smile to my face. emoticon
    2423 days ago
    Gee,that just happened to me! I couldn't just have a cup of that popcorn,No! I had to polish off the bag,grrr! The weird thing is I didn't gain,just lost,but I am very angry with myself.Will I quit,NO,just move on to better eating and more positive thoughts.Thank you for sharing this emoticon blog and for NP4LOSS for bringing this to my attention!
    2424 days ago
    You are the best, i always love your blogs. emoticon
    2424 days ago
    too many blockbusters or not - I love your pics (you know this already tho)!!

    Seriously though - I hear you on this sneaky person - she is a lurker for sure. And someone who unexpectedly pops in to voice her opinion! she's evil I say, and I hope the masked crusader thwarts her once and for all!!

    It's funny how certain numbers on the scale are freaky - as in, it's kind of panicky to get by them and you just know something is going to happen to stop it. I had one of those a little while ago - and I stayed off the scale for awhile to avoid the weirdness. I know you can't do this with the challenge and all. But I hope you get past this pesky number and smash it to smitherines!!

    I have lots of -y words in this post - not sure why that is. maybe you just bring that out in me! emoticon emoticon
    2424 days ago
    Love the blog, as usual!!!

    I wonder if Saboteur Shelli has been playing with Quelling Quita.
    She's been visiting my house the last couple of days. I just couldn't talk myself into the workout this morning. I hope I can convince her to lay off long enough for me to do something this evening. She's also the reason that I overate yesterday. I need her out of the house so I can get back on track before the weigh-in!

    2424 days ago
    This was so helpful...I have one of those and it was nice to see it put into words. This is a great post and it helps me face my own little Saboteur Steph...I can't thank you enough!!!!

    2424 days ago
    You rock! Yes I laughed out loud, thank you so much. You rock!

    You will win this round, WooHoo, I know it!
    2424 days ago
    You are one highly gifted woman...
    2424 days ago
    Stick in pin in that voodoo doll and kick her to the curb! emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2425 days ago
    We all slip up from time to time (I'm just getting back on track from a resent slip up in fact emoticon ). But the Super Sparky side of us will prevail in the end! emoticon
    2425 days ago
    I think you could make money off your blogs and inspiration!!!! You are a hoot!!!!
    2425 days ago
    We can do this! I too fell for it, right before hitting my goal. I was down to 140 and right before weigh in, went temporarily insane and didn't eat. Then, decided it was time to "catch up" and over ate. I lost a pound I think, but I was so much closer. I don't know why we do this. I have some ideas, but I really don't care. I'm just NOT doing it again. And now, with your self-awareness, I'm sure you won't either. emoticon
    2425 days ago
  • CAROLJ35
    You get her, Girl.

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2425 days ago
    I think SparkShelli could make lots of money if she licensed that orange mask and a matching orange cape. Just sayin'.
    2425 days ago
    emoticon Saboteur Shelli must have contact with No You Can't Nola. Spark Nola is having a very hard time staying in control of the situation so any and all Spark Powers will be appreciated. emoticon
    2425 days ago
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    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

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