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Degrees of Blonde

Friday, July 22, 2011


A married couple was asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning.
The very blonde wife picked up the phone, listened a moment,
and said 'How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!' and hung up.
The husband said, 'Who was that?'
The wife answered, 'I don't know, some woman wanting
to know if the coast is clear...'


Two blondes are walking down the street.. One notices a
compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up.
She opens it, looks in the mirror and says, 'Hmm, this person looks
The second blonde says, 'Here, let me see!'
So, the first blonde hands her the compact.
The second blonde looks in the mirror and says, 'You dummy, it's me!'

A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out
and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when
she opens the door she finds him in the arms of a redhead.
Well, the blonde is really angry.. She opens her purse to take out the
gun, and as she does so, she is overcome with grief. She takes the gun
and puts it to her head..
The boyfriend yells, 'No, honey, don't do it!!!'
The blonde replies, 'Shut up, you're next!'

A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals. She proudly
says, 'Go ahead, ask me.. I know 'em all.'
A friend says, 'OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin ?'
The blonde replies, 'Oh, that's easy. Its W.'

Q: What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?
A: 'Is it mine?'

Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman, sat in her US
Government class. The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade
was about.
Bambi pondered the question; then, finally, said, 'That was the decision
George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware ..'

Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house
ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and reported
the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9
unit, patrolling nearby, was the first to respond.
As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde
ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then
sat down on the steps. Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, 'I come
home to find all my possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and
what do they do? They send me a BLIND COP!'

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