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    CWYNN01   71,260
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Had My Breaking Point & Joined a Support Group for my Food Addiction!!

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Had My Breaking Point & Joined a Support Group for my Food Addiction!! Ready to Live a Life Free of PAIN!!

This blog is going to be very serious and personal, heartfelt blog.

Well this past Monday evening (June 18)- I had a talk with my spouse about how I have truly lost my way. I have lost all power and control with FOOD. I told him that it was to the point I am honestly scared for my life. For the first time I admitted that my weight might be leading to serious health problems, problems I thought would never be an issue for me~ like high blood pressure & even possible diabetes.

I have been in denial and he looked at me and said "You can only FAKE IT for so long." At that moment I knew exactly what he meant without him saying another wood. He said "You need more than just an online support; you need to join a local support group." He was absolutely correct b/c Spark has a lot of good tools but I am not getting the support like I need. I realized I only get support from a handful of people who reach out to me out of the 400 (+) friends I have. So I realized that I need that local help, a support network right here in my town...

So on Tuesday, June 19th I joined a support group to regain power over my life mentally, spiritually, & emotionally. For once I am truly ready to have power and control over FOOD. I am happy that I have come out of denial & realized this problem is bigger than just me doing it on my own. I have tried for so long to do it on my own but not really wanting to admit that I seriously Addicted to FOOD. I need to learn how to no longer let FOOD control my thoughts, my feelings, & my emotional well-being. Some may understand what I am saying and some may not but those who do understand, than you know it's a life of Misery, Discomfort, Pain, Frustration, & Emptiness.

I am tired of living this way & the truth is I HAVE BEEN SCARED OF LIVING up until now my life has just been GOING!!! Yep, just GOING Through life but not actually LIVING LIFE!! I am going to learn how to overcome my Addiction to FOOD!! I am WORTH IT!! I refuse to live the rest of my life ADDICTED TO FOOD!! So now it's time to really get to bottom of why I have become addicted to food & what I need to do to lead a life FREE & NOT ADDICTED TO FOOD!!

A Sparker had a quote she said, that I had to write down (don't know if it's by an author):

"You will Make CHANGES YOU Need To When the PAIN of STAYING Where You are Becomes Greater than Your FEAR of CHANGE!!!"

That's a Powerful & True message!!! My Pain is too strong & I am no longer Fearing this battle with Food. I am accepting that there is another way of Living than what I am merely doing of just Going & Existing.

I am ready to let go of this Pain & Start a Life that offers Love, Happiness, True Control, Power over Self, Peace, & Living!!! I AM READY TO LIVE!!

Thanks for reading & listening, hope my openness & honesty can help someone else.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MINKABONET 8/4/2011 4:30PM

    You are not alone but it's wonderful that you're seeking help for this problem. I've suffered as you have and want you to know you can learn to make peace with food.

One thing that helped me immensely in the beginning were books on the subject. Two excellent books that will lend guidance and inspiration as you start your recovery are "Overcoming Overeating" by Jane R. Hirschmann and Carol H. Munter, and "Breaking Free from Emotional Eating' by Geneen Roth.

Also, feel free to drop by and read any of my blogs, all of which deal with recovery from food addiction and eating disorders.

Asante and Shalom.

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HTENIGMA 7/27/2011 12:30PM

    Come check in on the 10 lbs in 30 days - I'm trying to revive the group.

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LIGHTNINGRUNNER 7/22/2011 10:54AM

    I am so proud of you. You made this decision on your own and now you know you can be honest with your support group. I hope you get everything you need and want from this group. I know in my heart you can recover from this addiction and be a better you - you will go on to help others facing this same issues. emoticon

Know I am always here to help if I can.

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LOUVENE51 7/22/2011 10:30AM

    Bless your heart!! You are on the right path and I pray that you have strength and wisdom to do what you need to do. Good Luck and thank you for your story emoticon


LouLOu

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IFDEEVARUNS2 7/22/2011 9:35AM

    Good luck to you. You are very brace and can win this. emoticon

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MSPLACEDAGAIN 7/22/2011 9:32AM

    Best of luck to you. I don't think a person can have too much support. Now you have home support, SP support and local support.

You can do this and you will be free.

Eden

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KITT52 7/22/2011 9:00AM

    good luck

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DOMESTICDIVA76 7/22/2011 8:55AM

    I think it's great that you admitted you need more help and reached out and got it! I really hope you are able to kick your addiction and find true happiness in your life. Hugs emoticon

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SEAWILLOW 7/22/2011 8:27AM

    Congratulations for taking a step forward! emoticon emoticon

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APLUSGURL 7/22/2011 12:42AM

    It is WONDERFUL that you are taking CONTROL of your Life! We reach a breaking point where it is truly make it or break it time. It doesn't mean you will be perfect, you will fall, BUT what matters is that you have the strength to get back up and keep on moving. Seeing your Blog Makes me think of a book that you may not be familiar with. I have read this book and it really got me to thinking about how I thought about Food.This book is called Full of Faith or Food. It is actually a Christian 12 step program for Food Addictions but I recommend it to anyone who knows they have no control over Food. You may read the book in it's entirety free online as a PDF. May this book bless your life.

http://www.fulloffaith.com/

I pray for your to overcome this addiction and May God Bless you and make you a VICTOR throughout this battle!!




emoticon emoticon

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GODZDESIGN95 7/21/2011 11:24PM

    Wow that is a good move. They used have one here but I dont; see it anymore.

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CTUPTON 7/21/2011 10:11PM

    You are NOT alone. Please believe that. Many of us have hit the breaking point! Success won't happen overnight. I sure wish it could. Recognizing the problem is step one. Little by little we change. I am glad you are finding the support you need and we all need!


emoticon emoticon Chris

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TRIGFROST 7/21/2011 9:53PM

    So "Happy for you" ... You must do what you have to do....Hands on w/ real people if this is what you need...there is all different types of support of what People need and if YOU found what you need...go for it...but it does not hurt to work w/ Sp-People also just to stay accountable also...so do what your Heart tells you to do.... emoticon

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LIFEWALK 7/21/2011 7:26PM

    thank you for sharing with such honesty. i understand the pain and the deep sorrow when we realize we are truy dealing with a food addiction/dependance. RW support is an excellent step, and I look forward to hearing about your progress.

I likely have mentioned this before but The end of overeating by David Kessler helped me understand how it becomes a physical addiction & what the food companies/restaurants are doing. Add to that the emotional dependance and the cultural/family lifelong events & ways of eating that are such a strong habit... I realized I was dealing with something all snarled up and it takes time to identify those eating patterns that are harming us, and time and practice to replace them....

emoticon emoticon emoticon you really can do this, and you've taken a huge step in facing this... (big hugs)

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SPARKLE1908 7/21/2011 7:11PM

    I am very proud of you...you are taking control of your life and that is wonderful!!! You will get the answers you need and will only get better from this point!!!!!

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SCHUBERTR1 7/21/2011 5:25PM

  It takes an extremely stong person to seek out help. You have already demonstrated that you believe you're worth it. You are going to beat this. It won't be easy and you'll have to recommit to getting & staying healthy everyday but I have no doubt that you'll do it. You deserve to the live you want!

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BITTYGIRL51 7/21/2011 4:53PM

    I commend you for you honesty and candor. Online support is great and very convenient, but I fully understand why you need the support of those that "have skin on" as I like to say.

I am also a Lifetime member of WW and worked as a leader for them for about 4 1/2 years. I have an "addictive personality" and so just about anything can become an addiction to me...even sparking!

I like to tell others - "It's rarely just about the food"...and that I for one had to work on the inside first, before I could begin to work on the outside. I had years of therapy and was a member of several support groups prior to ever losing any weight or joining WW.

When I left WW I wanted to start my own weight loss support group here in my city, but was told that I signed a "no compete" agreement and therefore could not work in the weight loss industry for 1 year from my resignation.

Oh well, God is good and I'm enjoying semi-retirement while still maintaining a healthy lifestyle.

You will be in my prayers. God Bless you for your honesty.

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LOSINGITAGN 7/21/2011 4:01PM

    I am proud of you for admitting u have a prob and also seeking additional help...I always believe it starts mentally first...im sorry you didnt get the help from your friends on here but remember if u dont share whats happening we cant help...

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BABY_GIRL69 7/21/2011 3:57PM

    I wish we had more Sparkers willing to locally hold support groups for their cities? I think the online tools we have here are great but to go & meet local Sparkers would be beneficial.

God bless & Way To Go!!

Dee

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PLATINUM755 7/21/2011 3:36PM

    It's great that you are taking back control for your life...I know the quote well and it does drive the point home...I love the determination that comes through in your message...Do keep us informed of your progress and plans...You are not alone on the journey! emoticon

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ANDI571 7/21/2011 2:58PM

    So glad you made your decision. Sparkpeople is great, but we all have to find our way on what works. I am a life time member of Weight Watchers. I have found that SP is a bonus to help me with that. What works for one, doesn't always work for another. Good for you!

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CALIPIDGIOUS 7/21/2011 2:42PM

    Hi there and congrats on taking that step! I was the sparker who had that statement on a blog of mine and it was not from an author, just me. I am glad if it gave you comfort and, hopefully, motivation! What you did is brave and fierce!

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LIVIN_THE_LIFE 7/21/2011 2:38PM

    Good for you and good luck in this journey. I hope you find all the resources you need and overcome this and start living your life.

I also love that quote ... I'm going to keep it in the back of my mind.



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BLESSEDGIGI 7/21/2011 2:34PM

    Good for you! emoticon emoticon

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JANRTEACH 7/21/2011 2:30PM

    So happy for you!! May you find the peace you've needed.

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