I really appreciate everyone's comments and encouraging words on my previous blog post. I think I need to add a little more about my eating issues, and that actually goes along with one of our countdown assignments that I was planning on skipping, and that I have skipped every other 5% challenge. It has to do with trigger foods and trigger situations.

I am a vegetarian, and I really like Weight Watchers' plan. To me, Weight Watchers is a method of helping you control your eating and helping you to plan what you eat, because they really don't give you a menu to eat by. The points system guides you to eat healthier, but you are free to choose what you want to eat. I love all fruits and vegetables, and I'm just as happy munching my way through a bag of baby carrots as a bag of chips on a normal day. So my vegetarian Weight Watchers plan isn't the problem.

My problem is emotional binging. Sometimes my triggers are external, but mostly they are internal which makes them much harder to identify, see coming, and avoid. My worst cravings are for sugar and bread, and I crave them all the time. Without my WW eating plan, all I would eat is sugar, carbs, and fat in any combination. Tracking is both my best friend and my worst enemy, because it helps me stay in control but when I fail it makes me feel really bad to write it down. Consequently, I hate to track my food as obviously I fail more than I succeed at staying in control.

I can force myself onto a strict diet, because I have done it in the past. The longest time I was on a strict diet, without giving in to my cravings, was about 9 weeks. I stayed on the Raw Food diet for 4 weeks, and lost 30 pounds. But these kinds of diets always end in an uncontrollable binge. So my weight has yo-yoed up and down and back up. I am done with all that misery.

One of the ways I am trying to cope with my eating issues is to use exercise. When my cravings hit, I try to make myself spend some time walking or dancing or on my Wii. So far, according to my scale, my eating issues are winning. But thanks to all my exercise, I am feeling better and I have more energy. So maybe I'm really winning?

I will keep on trying to make my diet as healthy as possible and control the cravings. One day I will make peace with my inner demon so we can co-exist peacefully.