Monday, July 11, 2011
Lately I've found myself struggling with a negative self-image and low self-confidence. I zip around SparkPeople reading motivational blogs and articles about nutrition, all these great things to help get my butt off the couch and eat well...
...and then I step out of the shower, naked, and face myself in the full-length mirror that covers my bathroom wall. And every blog, every article that I've read about motivation and healthy eating and exercise ceases to exist in the face of that reality. The folds of fat around my middle, the girth of my hips and lack of tone in my arms all scream out to me: YOU ARE FAT.
Therefore, you are ugly.
One of my primary reasons for losing weight is to feel HAWT again. I want to rock the body I had when I was 23, I want to wear hooker boots and size 6 skinny jeans and totally conform to every socially acceptable idea of sexy. I had a light flirtation with a very nice, fit, good looking man in the grocery store not too long ago. I joked, he laughed, and the little devil on my shoulder whispered in my ear: “You are too fat for him. There’s no way a good looking guy like that would ever go for a fat slob like you!” Girls, I put the vibe out, I could feel it. He wanted to ask for my number and my body was screaming STOP, BACK AWAY! to the tune of that unmentionable song by Nine Inch Nails (you know the one…). Looking back, I can’t blame him – my hormones were saying yes but my self-image was getting in the way.
According to dictionary.com, sexy is defined as (adjective):
1. Concerned predominantly or excessively with sex; risqué (CHECK – definitely have that one covered!)
2. Sexually interesting or exciting; radiating sexuality (!!!!!!!!!)
3. Excitingly appealing; glamourous (think sexy red convertible)
Huh. Nothing about weight; in fact, nothing about the shape or size of a person’s body at all. Can a person radiate sexuality without being a size 6?!
HELL YES. Perfect example: my younger sister is HAWT. She weighs about 40 pounds more than me and she’s sex appeal on two legs. She’s tits and ass and great hair and long eyelashes. She can snap her chubby fingers at any guy she wants and get him.
Because Sexy is an ATTITUDE. Sexy is confidence, it’s appeal and mind-set and self-assurance! And THAT is hawt!
Don't wait to be sexy, don't think that sexy will come after you've lost --- pounds. Know that you are hot NOW, just the way you are, and you will radiate sexiness!
I’m drawing my line in the sand and gathering my resolve – because I AM sexy. I am sexy enough for any guy, and I don’t need to lose 60 pounds to prove it!