Tuesday, July 05, 2011
I'm still healing and still frustrated by an assortment of things. Got home and started eating pre-SparkPeople comfort food and lots of it. Had company come last Friday and ate very evil, sodium filled convenience food. Company wanted to get out & do things, so we did and I was on my feet waaay too much. Was about to quit taking pain pills but then had to ramp that up again for a couple of days.
Last time I checked I was up 6 lbs and I'm sure it's more now considering how swollen my poor ankles are. So the good news is, I had several months of unswollen ankles and now I know just how uncomfortable they are since I'm no longer used to it. Which motivates me to get back on track.
However, I'm sort of embarassed to be as focused on "me" as I am. My 1/2 sister had a kidney removed due to cancer 3 mos ago & they just found tumors in her bladder at her check up. She'll have the tumors removed & do chemo, but this is seriously bad news. My Mom called today, freaked out because my grandmother (who has been in a nursing home) has gone into congestive heart failure. My husband has an abcessed tooth that he can't get pulled until next week. Really, what's a swollen ankle, sore hip or diet de-railment in the grand scheme of things? I would like to go home to support my Mom, but have a sick hubby and am not entirely sure me being there wouldn't make things worse for Mom. (She'd worry.)
Work is also being difficult. I had arranged to do some work from home before having surgery. Friday I put in 3 hours and today I had a message asking why I did that... Um, because that's what we agreed and because I want to do as much as I can so there isn't a disaster when I get back?
So. That leaves me with trying to eat healthier, because it's good for me and in turn that's good for everyone around me. And trying to figure out how to be supportive to family from a distance. And collecting my thoughts before talking to people from work so I don't say something I'll regret.