Monday, June 13, 2011
YOU KNOW YOU'RE A RUNNER WHEN YOU BUY HAMMER PRODUCTS IN BULK!
I feel a certain sense of dread about my long run tomorrow. I only have about 9 more opportunities to get the long distances in for my marathon training. my training due to my schedule is inconsistant at best so i do what i can in spite of the challenges. I have a sense of peace that it will all work out in the end but I cant shake the feeling like either i am totally wasting my time, what the heck are you doing this for?, WHY?, not again!, you're too fat to do this... and a whole host of negative left brain messages sent from hell just to screw up my momentum.
Trying to shake it off . This is all part of the mental game and the mental challenge that distance running throws up in our faces. Ill be fine but i am having to push through it and yes I am going to go in spite of how I feel tomorrow AM.
I also think that some of this is due to fatigue. just got off of 12hr shifts which ALWAYS leaves me in a positive upbeat mood...lol...
Long runs however, quite frankly are exhausting and lonely. I always feel a sense of accomplishment at the end of a successful endeavor BUT.... the amout of hours spent out there sweating, baking, cramping, pushing, sometimes taxes my will.
Just being honest.
This is all part of the price that this type of commitment demands. I am pushing my squishy body to do things that are difficult and challenging. The marathon does not play favorites, you either do the work or it will defeat you. there are no shortcuts. I guess that is one thing I like about this, there are NO glass ceilings, no good-ol'-boys club, no inside connections to get you in.
All must pass the test, no exceptions, no cheating, and the scales of running justice are truly blind and balanced.
total dedication and commitment is what is required to enter.... I'm knocking.