Wednesday, June 01, 2011
I have been feeling very overwhelmed again, by work, by finances, by this need to make living a healthy lifestyle a chore. I don't know why it is, but I know it contributes to my constant binging. I am always saying no to myself, forcing myself to do things that I don't want to do or things that I must, so it all ends up becoming me nagging myself constantly, which to be honest makes me feel like crap.
So my plan is to take the pressure off and go back to intuitive eating.. I follow ANEWAMANDA'S blogs and now she has a tumblr which has the 10 principles of intuitive eating, my nutrition is my worst! but if I follow these principles, If I make eating an event, to fuel and to enjoy my food. Not something I sit and not pay any attention to as I watch TV or read or do something that distracts me from what and how much I am eating. I am also not going to obsess about what I can't have. everything is available no food is good or bad but each food treats my body differently, therefore If I don't mind feeling like crap then I can continue eating junk but if I want to be energised, healthy and feeling good, there are foods that can give me that.
I have to leave Curves, I just can't afford it anymore, It's not much money but because I haven't been going it's feeling like a waste. I have come to the conclusion that I can exercise at any times, I do not need a gym membership, it's not essential. I can get the burn from yoga, kettlebell, skipping, walking, couch to 5k, weights, dancing, zumba, circuit training. It's all there waiting for me, without the cost plus there's no excuse if i can't get to the gym or the weather is bad there is always something I can do. it's not just about focused exercise for me right now though, it's about looking after myself, enjoying my life and dealing with whatever it throws at me, eating good food, that leaves me feeling great and a general healthy lifestyle will be enough! and that's what we aim for isn't it? at whatever stage of our journey we are in!
I have also realised that if I just walked instead of taking the bus, I would be doing enough exercise and burning enough calories to create a decent deficit but ONLY if I sort out my nutrition too, as in smaller portions, regular meals and not binging.
I need to listen to what my body is telling me!
In other news I am struggling to recruit students for my drama classes, I was worried this would happen because of it being where I live and it's not a place where people have spare money for these things but I will keep ploughing on see if I can get anywhere!
I am applying for a new job as a communications assistant for a local film company. It involves promoting and screening their film project they have going at the moment, it's quite an intense job but I am ready for the next challenge to be honest! It would be great for me getting back into a social environment, getting arts administration skills and being in a creative atmosphere. they want someone with an interest in filmmaking which considering I teach it I think I have it covered lol!
I am taking my time filling out the application form as I want to be honest with the experience I don't have BUT the skills I DO have that can be used to achieve the required work.
It's 15 hours a week so would exactly replace both hours and money wise, my support work!
It's a long shot as these jobs don't come up very often so every creative arts person in the vicinity will be applying - but you have to be in it to win it!
I am also coming up to a VERY busy couple of months, I have 7 weeks to organise the filming of 6 films, two of which I have written, I am in charge of everything and have an event at the local cinema to showcase them all in september .... so no pressure LOL!
Then with a bit of luck I will be running my own summer school! for the first week of august.
So lots happening, I am spending tomorrow - organising my life, finances, paperwork, project planning, the lot so had better get some much needed beauty sleep!!
I have also decided to take a break from facebook, far too much gossiping and me spending far too much time on there and it distracting me too often, so without it especially tomorrow I can get what I need to, done.
anyways LOOOOONG blog LOL!