I DID IT!!!
I’m still beaming with pride. My cheeks hurt from smiling so hard! Sunday, May 29th, as promised (to myself, on Friday afternoon after I got off the treadmill), I went for a run…outside!
Sunday afternoon– It was hot, sunny, and humid.
I drove to Jamaica Pond, with a huge knot in my stomach. I was so nervous. As I drove up to the pond, I could see all the runners just plugging along. They didn’t even look like they were sweating. I was so intimidated and SO unprepared. Where do I put my keys? My phone? There’s no little tray to set these things on, like on the treadmill. And I REFUSE to wear a fanny pack, so that wasn’t an option. My sports bra…ok, I looked lumpy, but whatever, my stuff was safe.
I stood by my car, did my stretches, drank some water, adjusted my headphones…and finally stopped stalling and just went for it! The pond has a 1.5mile circumference, so I figured I needed to make it around twice to call it a 5k.
Man, this is WAY harder than a treadmill! It didn’t even feel like the same exercise! Everything about it felt so different. It was hard. My breathing was all choked and ragged. The ground felt like it was coming up under me. And all my jiggly parts seemed to jiggle extra hard, so I was self conscience on top of everything else.
I had to stop, several times, to walk for a few and catch my breath before I could get back to jogging. I gotta admit there were moments where I really hated it. Well, actually, I hated all of it that first time.
There were people just whizzing by me, without a care in the world, and I know I looked like I was dying (cuz that’s how I felt!). And that was just the first 1.5miles! I felt awful!
But I remembered your words. A few of you told me that running outside was harder and what might feel like a failure, is actually an accomplishment. So I kept going.
50min it took me to run/walk 3miles. And I was a mess. I sat in my car with the A/C blasting, practically in tears because I felt like I had done horribly. But I wasn’t ready to give up, so I planned to be back the next day.
Monday morning - It was cloudy and cool.
What a friggin’ difference! This time around, I felt like I was flying! Lol! I planned my walk breaks, I gave myself mini-goals (i.e. jog to the next bench, walk for 30seconds, then jog to that tree…ok, now see if you can pass that guy, etc…) I felt so much more aware of what I was doing. I felt focused and I finished at 41minutes! Yay! (I know some of y’all can take down a 5k in 20minutes. I’m not there yet.) My car was parked on a hill, and I seriously could hear the Rocky theme song in my head, as I ran up that hill to finish my run, LOL!
I woke up with a sore knee this morning, so I don’t know if I should attempt to go out again tonight. But I really want to!
Some things that I learned:
The weather makes a BIG difference. So does my attitude. On that first run I was scared, self conscience, nervous, unprepared, and focused on everything BUT what I was there for. I was worried about what I looked like, what the “real” runners were thinking when they saw me, and how much I just wanted it to be over. And it was HOT out there! The second time though, it was like I was a different person. I don’t know what clicked from one day to the next, but I’m glad it did. I actually enjoyed my run. I felt like I belonged there. And thankfully it was much cooler.
The treadmill has been DEMOTED! At least until the snow comes, cuz I don’t see myself running in snow, lol!
Thank you so much for your inspiration, Sparkies! I owe this little victory to you.