Hi everyone! And,
again in advance for all of your thoughtful and caring words. They have all been truly appreciated. Hugs to all!
But, for those that were curious -- here is another Chapter in my book of "Schwannomas!" I saw the neurosurgeon yesterday and he is very hesitant and would rather not try to remove the "schwannoma" (tumor) due to its location. I'm good with that trust me -- it is inside one of the nerves in my spine, so one nerve that doesn't reconnect as it should, could mean alot of problems -- and more than I have now! (Plus, you'll see in the paragraph below, why I think he is "afraid" to cause any sort of trauma to my body right now.) So, I'll go back for a 5th MRI in 5-6 months and see if the tumor is growing, has stayed the same or ??? I can still walk, stretch, do sit-ups and more -- no backache at all! Who knows how long that tumor was there and didn't cause a problem! They are supposedly slow-growing and usually benign -- so it's possible I've had it for many, many years. But, the related symptoms and tingling or numb sensations or a feeling like a jack knife just slashed across both ankles -- or maybe a hot iron just went down my right thigh. Oooh -- something just felt like a spark went off in my left calf area and the arch of my right foot hurts to the touch -- No matter the feelings, I know and expect them in ways, just not exactly where they decide to appear and when. But when they come, I'm okay -- I know we're working on resolving everything and eventually those feelings will ease or better yet, leave!! Knowing what possibly is causing the problem -- is a huge part of the battle. And, I can't and won't give up now! Nope! Not this Momma!
Funny thing is the drs. still can't figure out why I'm so flexible and that I can touch my palms on the floor when they ask, how far down I can bend. Maybe I should whisper "Check out Sparks.com" and they'd see why! But yet, there are days when I cannot walk in a straight line heel to toe, (Thank Goodness, I don't drink! If I had to take a sobriety walking test -- I'd probably fail!) as my right knee throws me off balance. So, I practice it every day - some days I can get 10 steps heel to toe -- the next 25 and the next back to 8. But, I'm not giving up! Knee and ankle brace on, keep stretching, moving and staying as active as I'm able, that's my plan of attack. Determination and motivation to keep going, even though there are days when I feel like I lost it -- it magically reappears again the next day! All part of the ups and downs of life -- and knowing that even though we feel down one day -- we can pop up the next and back on track and ready to take on the day!
But, me and my schwannoma! Sorry, it still sounds like a song
to me and I do tend to make light of it -- it's alot better than dwelling on it negatively which wouldn't help me at all, if not worsen it. Adjusting my lifestyle a bit and continuing with the medical profession are my positives and I just keep going from one specialist to another -- as I'm adding yet another new specialist to my list!
Here we go, Chapter 2 or ??? Now, we've added another few twists -- so, move over, schwannoma! You're no longer in the spotlight!
As part of this whole issue, I had a brain scan and the results weren't too positive! Yes, I will admit -- when I heard the results, I just sat and cried afterwards and asked the old "why me?" I was told there were signs that I had had small strokes -- which I kinda knew or figured before -- and white matter where it doesn't belong which could be from the migraines that I've now developed since this all began. Blood work was done -- yup, another abnormal and more tests ahead! Now, I'll be going back to a rheumatologist or hematologist to get a few of those abnormal readings figured out -- and we'll see what is connected to what and if, in fact, it is.
I know I've shared here at Sparks that I love to learn, but with the help of a back specialist, multiple MRIs, ultrasounds, and more tests that I can even remember right now, a neurologist, neurosurgeon and next a rheumatologist, I think I'm learning enough and I'm not sure if my brain can hold much more information! Maybe that's where the migraines are coming from! Just kidding -- but it does keep me going from one appointment to another and that is why there have been days when my status is that I'll be off-line. Off-line here at Sparks, but on-line and going to one specialist or another. So, please don't worry if you see an "off-line" on my friend status -- I'm just doing what I have to do and we're going to beat this problem -- through one appointment and test to another -- never give up hope. I haven't!
Concentrate on the positives -- everything that we wonder "why me" -- could be alot worse! Don't ignore something you feel or don't feel (numbness, etc.), something that doesn't feel right with your body and you're not certain why it feels as it does. Don't be afraid to ask your doctor questions. It's your body and you're taking care of it here at Sparks by living the healthy way -- so keep taking care of YOU! This is your time for health and happiness and I wish you all that and so much more!
positive and smiling!
You deserve it!
(And, stay tuned, I'm sure Chapter 3, 4 and 5 are yet to come! And, I can hardly wait to share the last Chapter, so I can close the book on this one!)