I'm supposed to be at a gym class right now, but after a 4-day weekend of company and craziness, I needed the peace and quiet more than the workout (that'll come later - right after this is posted!)
I also needed to get caught up on SP news, as those 4 days caused me to go AWOL from the site (okay, fine; really, I was eating too poorly and didn't want to disappoint myself more by checking in and logging zillions of calories with no exercise minutes. There. I owned up :) It always surprises me how much of my motivation and determination is connected to the SP community.
For instance: I was reading a friend's blog this morning about mind over matter and how it's tied to everything we do; how much we excercise, what kind of day we're going to have, what we eat, etc. But one question she posed hit home like a sledgehammer: "what day will you actually start your REAL program to get into the best shape of your life?"
My knee-jerk reaction? "Well, duh. Isn't that what I've been doing here on SP for the past 3 years?!"
Then reality set in (along with a healthy dose of brutal self-honesty.) That's NOT what I've been doing. What I've been doing is paying attention to calories and nutrional values; soaking up pages and pages of info on nutrition, exercise, weight loss and - most recently - enjoying interacting with people in the same position as me.
Now, don't get me wrong. These are all invaluable tools and I could not have made it as far as I have without any of it. BUT. What has any it really done for me?
- I've lost over 30lbs
- I've 'met' some incredible people, many of whom I rely on to lift me up, motivate me and make me face myself honestly. I hope I do the same for them.
- I've developed better eating habits, and in the process, created a healthier lifestyle for my family
- My self-confidence is making an appearance again and sticks around most of the time
- I've dropped 4-6 pant sizes and 2 shirt sizes
- I don't feel like a beached whale in a swimsuit (most days)
- I have more energy (most days)
- My body feels and looks healthier, inside and out!
BUT. I've not stuck to a consistent running/walking program and a strength-training program is virtually non-existent. I even signed up for the "Spring Into Shape Bootcamp" but haven't been doing it. SO. Am I in the best shape of my life?
NO. I AM NOT.
Sure, I've lost a bunch of weight and I've had to shop for a new wardrobe. But I still have tricep 'wings', back flab, thighs that rub together and a belly pouch. Because of this, I'm not comfortable seeing myself naked (or in a bra and panties for that matter!) And you know what? I'd like to.
39 days from now (July 2nd) my sister-in-law is getting married. Four days ago, I bought a dress (at the insistence of my son and sister) that I never would have looked twice at if my sister hadn't hauled it off the rack, shoved it at me and told me to try it on. It's everything I've always avoided: strapless, form-fitting and a size that actually fits and not one that's a size too big. (I even bought a new bra for it!) And I'll admit, I look pretty darn good in it.
The problem? It shows far more skin than I'm currently comfortable with, and it's a bit too snug for my liking.
Yeah, I know what you're thinking: so why'd I buy it?
It's simple really: because I've worked damn hard to get into, and be comfortable, in a dress like this. And my sister says I look hot in it :)
So what's the problem chick?
That's simple, too: I still see all the flaws of my body reflected in that dress, and in 39 days, 100+ people - half of whom I don't know - will see them, too.
Which brings me back to the question my friend posed this morning: "what day will you actually start your REAL program to get into the best shape of your life?"
Guess what? For me, that day is TODAY.
TODAY I start back at day 1 of Bootcamp
TODAY I'm going for a 6k run (right after I post this)
TODAY I made an appointment for a personal trainer to set up a ST program at my gym (this Thursday at 11:15am)
TODAY I'll be back on track with my nutrition, and recording it on the SP tracker
TODAY I wrote down how many minutes of exercise I want to achieve each day of the week (30 minutes M-F and 10 on weekends.) I put that goal on my calendar for all whe world to see.
TODAY I wrote down my weekly weigh-in goals through to June 30th.
TODAY I decided that no matter what I look like on July 2nd, I will wear that dress with a smile, confidence, pride and no spanx! And I will know, regardless of the flaws I may see, that for 39 days I worked my hardest to be the best I could be.
TODAY is the day I start my REAL program to get into the best shape of my life.
(quote used with permission from original author)