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    BEKKASHAY   18,571
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In a weird place...


Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Hey Sparkers!! Well, I havent blogged in awhile! Life has been INSANE!! We moved suddenly and my husband is in a six month interview/process for his dream job in a different state, so we might be moving again AHH...so I haven't been putting MY ALL into Spark or weight loss in the last 3 months. I have been maintaining though. I still workout out and Monday thru Thursday I log my food (on paper or on Spark) and do awesome.....THEN Friday morning comes..I do my weekly weigh in..and it usually says 150.0 (to the ounce). If I am lucky it will say 149.something. So then I eat an okay lunch...then we ALWAYS go out to dinner on Friday (and I am so tired from being strict all week, I usually eat something bad)...then I will get dessert later on in the night since I already did bad at dinner...then I will stay up late and usually eat popcorn or something else more horrible. Then I get up Saturday and eat out and eat crappy ALL DAY, and then I feel guilty Sunday and end up eating half good/half bad...I weigh in Monday morning and I am usually 155!!! AHHHHHHHH...so repeat the week again...by Friday I will be 150..and it starts alll over. So I gain and lose the same 5 lbs EVERY week for MONTHS!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME???????????? I am sooo close to my goal..I just want to be 140 and I will be happy. I have been doing this sooo long , I am just burnt out...but at the same time, I am still not happy at this weight AT ALL. I get all these emails everyday with people that need to lose over 100lbs and ask me what to do...and I need to TAKE my own advice (I tell them to start they need to dedicate 30 days with NOT one cheat)...Do I really not want to get to 140??? Its also hard when EVERYWHERE I go, everyone tells me how amazing I look!! I know that sounds like a fabulous thing, but then it gets me too comfortable in my weight. At the end of the day I have LOTS of fat and flab that still needs to go. I am still technically 5lbs overweight. SO I am taking volunteers to come up to Michigan and beat some sense into me...I HAVE COME SO FREAKIN FAR, why AM I SABOTAGING MYSELF-TEN POUNDS is NOTHING compared to what I have lost!!! GRRRR...that it! Their was no point! Just had to get my feelings out in hopes I wont blow it AGAIN this weekend!!

My new favorite pic of my daughter and I :) HOpe the next one is 10 lbs lighter!!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
MRSDAVIS09 8/28/2011 4:16PM

    I'm 14 pounds from goal. . .the last pounds are always the hardest. . .just focus on maintaining until after baby, and read and learn and soak up information all through your pregnancy to help you keep your goal in mind. You'll be ready to go after it once baby comes. You are a winner, and you've proven that you can DO it. . .take a deep breath and remind yourself that you didn't gain the weight overnight, and it's okay if it takes a while to get it all off.

You wanted to get pregnant. . .that was your ultimate goal. You met that goal! You are a WINNER!!!!!

God Bless :)

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LIVESTRONG2010 5/18/2011 9:21PM

    I so can relate to you. I haven't been on track for the last six months but I'm not doing anything right. Thank God that I've only gained 6 pounds. Trying hard to get back on track.

Take care of you lady!

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BOJANMA1 5/12/2011 9:19AM

    Consider yourself kicked. Okay now I'll bend over and you kick me. emoticon



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BETTERJULIA 5/11/2011 11:40PM

    You are doing great! You are so right that you can do these last ten pounds - its all mental now you know what to do and how to do it now DO IT! I would say start by right now planning on what you'll have for dinner Friday - make it a crock pot meal so that it is on and cooking and ready for you to eat and you cannot waste by going out. If you do good with that make a yummy but healthy dessert to have afterward and play cards w/ your hubby or daughter (allie loves skip bo) keeps your hands busy. Then from there you can make it through Saturday. Small steps - one meal at a time you'll make it through this weekend and then you'll have no excuses next week. I believe in you!

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