I's 10 days since my last entry and I'm scarily up 4 lbs. That feels awful if I'm honest.

However, this is what life is. Disappointments and challenges. I don't feel the greatest right now and my biggest worry is that my depression is returning. I've been off my meds completely since January though I tapered through getting off some of them as early as June last year.

Work is stressful because my contract is being renegotiated. I may or may not have a job at the end of May but i should know this week.

I'm sort of still sick. I can't quite put my finger on what is wrong but my stomach hurts when I eat certain foods and I just feel tired all the time.

I get the overall feeling that its very much a mental game right now and I'm not winning. I refuse to lose however so I'm focusing on that. I need to find out what i'm upset about and what I can do about it. The weight loss, while vital, is less important than my happiness.