The pavement stretched out before me this morning, sun beating down, warm spring breeze in my face and through my flowing skirt, as I peddled my bike to work. I breathed in the smell of fresh cut grass and thought - this is the first scent of summer. And how beautiful it is!
I've been daydreaming all day about getting home tonight and sitting out in my yard with a magazine and an iced Berry LaCroix water, taking in the remains of one of the most beautiful days I have ever experienced.
It's making me emotional, these winds of change. Not just in the change of seasons, finally to something warm and sunny, but because I can see and feel and taste the change in me. The things that I have denied and shied away from for so many years. The thought that maybe, this year, I can begin to embrace all of those wonderful things that I have been loathe to experience because...I couldn't.
My dear Sparkfriend LOTUSFLOWER wrote the most beautiful blog today about everything she's looking forward to doing this summer. www.sparkpeople.com/mypa
It brought tears to my eyes knowing that someone else has felt the same things that I have - the gorgeous summer days spent on the couch avoiding shorts, and bathing suits, and activity.
I AM a creature of nature. I love sunshine and lake breezes and the feeling of my skin turning brown from spending time outside in the warmth. And for far too long I have ignored this part of myself. I have literally kept her sheltered inside a dark hole and have not let her breathe the air she so longs for. But not this summer! I haven't sat on my couch in over 3 weeks now. And I like it that way!
Despite the scale's need to disappoint for the past few weeks, today I broke out my first sundress of the season - an item I bought to celebrate my 100 pound weight loss in April. When I bought it, it was still a little tight, but today I put it on and it is loose, and flowy - it fits perfectly. It has confirmed that regardless of what the scale says or does not say, my body is still in this fight. I am enjoying my day of spaghetti straps and bare legs - sunglasses still firmly on my head in anticipation of my trip home.
Here's to the beginning of the season! One of bikes and barbeques, running and reading outside in the sun, pools and ponds, hikes and lighter hair. I embrace my love for the great outdoors. The smells and sounds of summer. A smile on my face the first time I heard the familiar bells of the ice cream truck on my street this week. Gulls circling a picnic lunch. The roar of engines of cars that are just as happy to be out from under the dustcover as I am to be freed from my plastic covered winter windows.
I am anticipating my most active summer yet. Already I have cancelled my bus pass in lieu of riding my bike to work as much as possible. With the extra money I save, I can hopefully buy myself something fun! There will be swimming and training for a 10K in August. And I am just so happy that I am ENJOYING being outside, opting to walk 4 miles home last week on a simply beautiful spring day. It's refreshing for the soul, taking a moment to smell the blossoms and feel the breeze. I feel awake and am excited for all of the new opportunities that the season has to offer.
Wishing you all the best summer yet! Look for me on the patio!