Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Three years ago today was the very worst day of my life.
My stepmother of 25 years, who I loved so much, died of breast cancer. I was with her at the end, along with my little sister Lucy. I will never forget the look on my 17 year old sister's face the moment that her mom's heart stopped beating.
Also, I broke my leg. Yes, the SAME day. And I was 6 weeks preggo with my now 2 year old. So no pain killers. And I wasn't sure if I was going to lose the baby. And I was 1,000 miles from home.
And it's all a hundred times more sad and ugly and awful than that. Because death and grieving bring out the worst in people sometimes.
These anniversaries always mess with my head. And make me emotional. And I thought I could write about it because I was ready and it's been three years and it all came raining down on me this week THAT I WASN'T.
I DELETED THE REST OF THIS POST BECAUSE I HAD BLOGGER'S REMORSE BUT LET'S JUST SAY THAT SOMEONE I LOVE HURT MY FEELINGS AND IT FELT LIKE I GOT PUNCHED IN THE F*CKING FACE AND THEN I FORGAVE THEM BECAUSE THEY'RE HAVING A ROUGH TIME RIGHT NOW AND I THINK ITS ALL GOING TO BE OK.