Wednesday, March 30, 2011
This was the intro I had posted on my sparkpage for several months. It's time for a new update. Here's what was going on then:
Still feeling in emotional limbo since the death of my friend last December.
Braces were removed in June and my teeth are beautifully aligned. Waring retainers most of the day and at night. So rare now to feel pain in my jaw, neck or upper back. Sparms in my lower back are unusual too.
During those 5 years while I was trying to unravel why I had so much muscle inflamation, pressure from my siblings added more stress. I was expected to 'do and be' like them .. at a pace I could not keep up with. One of my sisters recently admitted she's always believed I was a hypocondriac.
It hasn't helped that my mother was seriously ill for a year when I was three and I was shuffled here and there to relatives, cared for by a housekeeper, or cared for by older sisters who were in high school at the time.
My childhood development was very unlike that of my sisters. I grew up feeling I was switched at the hospital. I've always liked who I was, even though I never felt I really fit within my family dynamics. My interests, personality, temperment, even my appearance is different from three out of my four sisters.
So I've come to the conclusion at least for now that spending time with my sisters isn't healthy. I don't miss the energy or hard work it's taken for me to feel like I even remotely fit in.
I'm very sad to be isolated from my family and happy to be feeling better. I"ve got the support of my husband and son in my decision. They've witnessed what I go through .. and feel I've made the right decision.
Many of us mention how family members expect us to 'diet' on what they eat. I experience something similar. I feel my family expects me to thrive on their 'emotional' nutrition. Nope .. doesn't work for me.
Hoping to improve or at least maintain my bone density, I'm taking 1500 mg calcium a day eating non-fat yogurt, calcium chewables, and a calcium citrate supplement at night. On cloudy days, I'm taking an additional Vit D supplement.
Doing 25 push-ups a day and will keep doing more as I get stronger, walking lots of stairs, and use the elliptical several times a week.
Fosamax limits my time in the sun, so I've become an early morining, twilight gardener. Since I've started on the Fosamax and the summer was sooo hot, my rosacea was quite painful. Cooler days have helped calm it down.