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The Bible According to Kids

Monday, March 28, 2011

The following statements about the Bible were written by children and have not been retouched or corrected (i.e., bad spelling has been left in.)

- In the first book of the Bible, Guinesses, God got tired of creating the world, so he took the Sabbath off.

- Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree.

- Noah's wife was called Joan of Ark because Noah built the ark, which the animals came to in pears.

- Lot's wife was a pillar of salt by day, but a ball of fire by night.

- The Jews were a proud people and throughout history they had trouble with unsympathetic Genitals.

- Samson was a strong man who let himself be led astray by a Jezebel like Delilah.

- Samson slew the Philistines with the axe of the Apostles.

- Moses led the Hebrews to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread, which is bread without any ingredients.

- The Egyptians were all drowned in the dessert.

- Afterwards, Moses went up to Mount Cyanide to find the ten commendments.

- The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.

- The seventh commandment is "Thou shalt not admit adultery".

- Moses died before he ever reached Canada.

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
2BEATIT1 4/3/2011 11:59PM

    Great blog for a smile.
Thanks for sharing

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NTSOHLTHNT 3/30/2011 6:37PM

    LOL! Kids do say the darndest things. Thanks for sharing.

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IDLETYME 3/29/2011 8:03AM

    You can learn a lot listening to kids! Thanks for sending us a smile!

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ELLENSUN 3/28/2011 10:26PM

    I like the one about the first commandment. Maybe that child was right.....

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ELLFIN3 3/28/2011 1:47PM

    Thanks for the laugh!! Those are great!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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CJSARGENT1 3/28/2011 11:59AM

    kids say the cutest things. Thank you

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ALICERIEGER 3/28/2011 11:01AM

    I always enjoy hearing kid's take on things. Thanks for sharing.

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JOHNWBROCKSR777 3/28/2011 5:53AM

    Love It!

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PICKLEDGINGER2 3/28/2011 5:45AM

  Another gem: The Epistles were the wives of the Apostles.

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MARYJOANNA 3/28/2011 5:31AM

  How cute! You never know what kids will say.

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