Monday, March 21, 2011
To all the people in the world who have ever stood in front of there mirror and wished for some one else's -------- fill in the blank this blog is for you. Today I was in a clothing store with my little girl helping her try on pants, as she pulled on pair after pair of cute little jeans, she was chatting to her self but I could not realy hear what she was saying because I was talking on my cell phone. I smiled and nodded at a pairs of pants that looked good on her then almost dropped the phone in shock at what I heard my beautiful baby girl mutter under her breath... "These pants are so cute to bad they make me look so FAT!" she said with a sigh What?? She is 6 and weighs 55lbs soaking wet how can she already believe this about herself?
Then the truth hit me like a tone of bricks, I am the culprit, I am to blame for planting these negative patterns in my child head. She has sat on my bed and listened as I try on outfits and talk about my "thunder thighs" she has watched me step on the scale and wither in horror at any gains or losses, she has bean there to witness me berate and belittle myself as I evaluate an ill fitting bathing suit or the muffing top on my "skinny jeans" so why am I so surprised. Isn't this the same girl who puts on my shoes and carry's my purse around, who dresses up in my old dresses and plays house, & mimics me on my cell phone or driving my car? Of course she is going to fallow my lead just as I fallowed my mothers.
So what can I do? I could waist time blaming my mothers bad example I guess but that is yesterdays news, I could try to talk her & try to make her stop saying things like " I'm fat" but that's just putting a band-ad on tomorrows problems. No I am going to start today to change how I talk to me, how I see me and the exampled I put in front of my little girl so that she will never have to battle low self esteem, so that she will know how to positive self talk and see herself as the beautiful person she is no matter what size she ends up being. That is how I can change tomorrow.