Sunday, March 06, 2011
ok.. this will not be the most positive blog... - so you can pass... (i just have to jolt down a few ideas)
ok... so... i had lost 20 lbs... started eating after comments on my weight (THAT next time i should be able to handle - so that's settled): MAN, I'M BACK TO INITIAL WEIGHT. So, from -20 to 0. As if, i HAD to be back to point 0. (it's ok, i can go back down, more like -30 next time (to goal), but just GRRRRRR maddening (and... so 'me': no gray, black or white, start at starting point again, not in between)
AND WHAT I DISCOVERED:
my 'easy' state (as in no effort), is no exercise, eating whatever i want, and eating my stress (and everything in between)
ever since my early teenage years, even childhood, i'd try to incorporate exercise (as in exercise like a mad woman) AND EVENTUALLY GO BACK (INERTIA) to nothing at all.
SO.. I NEED TO FIGHT INERTIA.
(and.. as i know a tiny bit about physics, once the potential energy is sort of transformed into kinetic energy - well.. you're moving, and when you start moving, and into the habit of moving, well... it's HARDER to stop, and easier to just keep going
i just believe have never gone to that point.
never gone to the point where 'hhhhaaaa!!! more energy either
i KNOW (in my brain) i have to start SLOWLY to not burn out, but, man, that is so not me. it's like all or nothing. but i'm going to try.
(i would also sooooo like to join a gym (i'll blog about it) - but want to take advantage of the membership if i pay (i LOVE the treadmill!!!) - so there is NO WAY i'm going to go for 10 minutes. (blog to follow)
if i can just fight inertia.
WONDERFUL WEEK TO ALL!!!!!
(i hope this wasn't depressing...)