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My cats are plotting against me

Friday, March 04, 2011

No really, they are. Today I got home with my subway sandwich that I have been looking forward to all day long. I went into the treadmill room to do battle with my gym equipment. I turned on the fan and the tv and turned around to find Stanley, my orange fur baby, using my treadmill as his personal emery board. I clap my hands and he pauses to give me a look. Cat owners know the look, it says, "can I help you?", with a snide little smirk. I turn back around and grab my water bottle and Stanley is now lying in the middle of my treadmill. I go to pick him up and he hisses at me! My ungrateful baby hissed at me!! So, I turn the treadmill on thinking it will scare him to death and he will never get on it again. Nope, he glares at me and RIDES the treadmill until he is thrown off at the bottom (it was going 0.5 so it took a good 4 - 5 seconds to throw him off). Then I get THE LOOK. Yep, the @#$% you @#%$^% look. And he proceeds to saunter to the front of the treadmill where he continues his death stare at me for the ENTIRE 33 minutes. THE ENTIRE THING!

OK, one cat pissed off at me out of five is a pretty good ratio. Many times I have had 3 or 4 mad at me at one time for whatever reason.

I go to the kitchen and grab my longed for Subway sandwich. I get a couple of pieces of deli turkey from the fridge, slap it on the sandwich and go to sit down and have a nice dinner in front of the TV. BUt then I remember I need to track my dinner and exercise on SP so I leave my Subway and go to the computer. I am back in 5 minutes. I sit....I feel something cold and wet in my seat....that is not normal....I jump up and there is a pickle slice on my seat. Hmm, my sandwich looks unscathed so what the heck is going on? I open it up and yep, my cats stole my turkey. Both slices. Left the cheese, no evidence of the robbery except for the lone pickle slice. I am left to eat my proteinless sandwich after being harassed on my treadmill in my own house.

Did I mention every ONE of these fur babies was saved from euthanasia?

My conclusion: my cats are plotting against me.
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