Saturday, February 19, 2011
****I moved this down to the blog from my spark page because I wanted to keep this entry as a reminder of where I have come in my journey,but I wanted to make over the sparkpage.****
It has truely been one of the hardest years of my life! As many of you know my husband was murdered in front of me March of 2008. I have never really lost anyone in my life other than an older friend as a teen and my Grandma who I knew was going to die well in advance. I had greived those people, but it was nothing like losing my husband of 14 years and the father of my children. NOw I am here learning how to be on my own with our two kids and this last year has just been about getting through how ever we could. We've ate more fast food in the last year than most people have in their life time, simply because sitting down to a normal dinner doesn't feel so good when someone is missing.
Well court was friday and the killer is in prison so that is said and done and now it is time to try and move on and live the best life I can live for these kids because I am all they have left. I am tired of being fat and feeling miserable and using food to get me through all these stresses in life. I have got to learn to live again. God spared me that day and for whatever reason the gun jammed and I was not killed, I owe it to God my family and myself to do the best with this second chance that I have been given. It is not going to be easy and I may cry and fight myself every step of the way, but one way or another I am going to get healthy!
THank all of you who have supported me this last year with all your kind words and prayers, I will never forget it. Please keep praying for me as I try to get healthy and learn to raise these kids on my own. I need all the help I can get. Any tips and advice is always welcome.