Hi Scott... it's going to be Super Bowl Sunday again. I can't believe it will be three years since I last saw you! I remember every minute of that day: you BBQing platters of meat on your patio, the delicious potluck spread, and dozens of friends gathered in your living room watching the game on your brand-new HD TV.
Remember when you asked who everyone was cheering for, and every single one of us said "The Giants!"? Then you asked, "Are you actually rooting FOR the Giants, or is it more 'anyone is better than the Patriots'?" I still laugh telling this story: every one of us shouted... NOT the Patriots! You were in your element as host.
Most of all, I remember deciding to leave at half-time, because DH had to go to work at 4am, and we faced a long drive home. Plus, it was crowded; we'd give up our chairs, so more of your friends could sit down. I went to tell you, and you tucked me under your arm and pulled me against your chest, hugging me tight.
I still remember how that felt... and how we stood together hugging, talking, saying "see you soon." You said you'd come up and spend a whole Saturday with me as soon as you could, probably in a couple of weeks. I remember hugging you much longer than usual, feeling SO blessed and grateful to be your Mom!
We ended our conversation as we always did. I don't know if you said it first and I answered, or I said it first and you answered, and it doesn't matter. We'd say it either way, whatever came naturally... so "I love you" were our final words to each other that day. We hugged again, laughed and kissed, and I went home.
I don't know WHY thinking about and trying to plan for this year's Super Bowl is SO much harder than the last two years! Something is drawing these sad emotions out of me - I don't even feel motivated to try faking a party mood. I'm definitely going to watch the game, though - and think of you, Scott, with a smile!
So who are YOU rooting for this year, kiddo?! I'm thinking you'd choose the Packers, the rookie underdogs, over the know-it-all Steelers (I'll be cheering for Green Bay). Maybe you could swing by and give me a sign, a nudge, a bit of understanding about what's going on in my head this year?!
I MISS YOU, Scott!!!
Love always, Mom ~