Tuesday, February 01, 2011
Weight: 189.2 lbs (up 5 lbs since 10/20/10)
Neck: 14 (up 0.5 inches since 10/20/10)
Upper Arm: 14 (up 1.5 since 10/20/10)
Forearm: 10.5 (up 1 since 10/20/10)
Waist: 37 (up 3 since 10/20/10)
Hips: 44 (up 2 since 10/20/10)
Thigh: 26 (up 3 since 10/20/10)
Calf: 15.5 (up 0.5 since 10/20/10)
Rib Cage: 34 (up 2 since 10/20/10)
I can't believe its been over three months since my last blog or that I've allowed myself to gain when I worked so hard to loose. I'd never before understood how those who had met their goal weight could allow themselves to gain it all back; the past couple of months have been an eye opener for me.
I was doing great until Halloween, but then I lost control; I thought I had a handle on the food situation and therefore could have an occasional "extra". There is NO occasional "extra" with someone who has a food addiction and/or is a food binger (I am both). I could easily blame it on the holidays or the stress in my life, but bottom line: I gave up on myself.
I've been in counseling for several months now and have barely scratched the surface; there are days I want to cancel a session and others where I feel like progress has been made. Learning to face your demons and to love yourself isn't easy, but I'm finally working on ME and its a good feeling.
The girls and I have settled into somewhat of a routine; we've been in our apartment for three months now and its been an adjustment: the holidays were quite different, but weren't as hard I'd thought; we've downsized & are learning to adjust our budget accordingly; I'm making payments to an attorney and have filed for divorce, child support & full custody of our girls; my husband hasn't made an effort to pay support or have a relationship with our girls; and my husband's family has continued to provide support & be active members of our lives.
Not much else to report, but I'd like to thank my SP family for their outpouring of love and support throughout my time of need. Keep spreadin' that SPARK and know your continued faith in me inspires ME to go that extra mile! God bless and hugs to all= )