Eurêka! My bath tub epiphany moment.

Friday, January 21, 2011

So I was in the tub. With my iPhone (I'll get to that later). I had just gotten in the tub and, although i could have just relaxed, I did not have my headphones to listen to the theta meditation (and since i had already done it in the bus...) So, I grabbed the Spark and started reading. Lots of great stuff- darn! no highlighter. I folded the pages' corners. After a while, it felt like there was already too much stuff i wanted to integrate and was loosing attention. So i grabbed the iPhone instead and began playing. And since I resolved my puzzle on the first try (about once every 200 games), I shut the game. It would be a sacrilege to not let that last impression, last. At least a little. And because I like long baths, I had to find more stuff "todo" ;)
So I looked up jobs with Indeed app. Nothing new since this morning. Ok lets put the iPhone down (but not before i check email - typical isn't it...) Nothing new there, last email was that of my aunt.

(you could have skipped the first paragraph I guess...) Her email was about the Millionaire Mind Intensive next week-end I invited her to attend to. She was asking if she could crash at my house. Funny, her son had written me on Facebook to ask the same thing and if there was going to be simultaneous translation. I had replied Yes and NO to him but he had not confirmed whether he was coming or not. As it often happens to me, started a little imaginary conversation jumping between him an I and her and I:

Him: No I don't think so. It's gonna be to complicated to follow if its only in English.
Her: I don't know if I will understand. Why does it always have to be in English
Me: Because most of the self-growth and other gurus and motivational speakers are doing it and producing it in English. Because most the literature is available in English.
Her: It does not anger you?
Me: I'm perfectly bilingual (Feeling a wave of gratitude that I am and can have access to these courses and subliminal program such as John Assaraf's )
Her: Right, it's easy for you.
Me: It has not always been! I remember I used to have headaches going to conferences.
Him with a pout: English is hard

Me, remembering:

I hated to learn English. But I liked good grades. So I had good grades for my written English and was forced to take the advanced program in 4th grade of high school. It was an horrible year. I had to spend more time doing English homework than other subjects together. In 5th grade they allowed the students in the advance program to choose which courses they wished to continue in the advance profile and which they were to take in the regular. I was going to switch when my English teacher suggested it would be ashamed that all this years efforts would have been for nothing, that I had improved so much that the regular program would not bring anything to me and that the curriculum had been revised to be more manageable. I took my courage and a leap of faith and continued with the advanced 5th grade English course (which was basically the same difficulty level than my mother language 5th grade French course.) At the end of that year, I won a french literature contest and the prize was a trip to Valley Forge Pennsylvania to attend a seminar... in English LOL.

Quickly more memories of the past 23 years raced in my mind... When I went to Japan and got to use English with people from a great variety of countries (and accents) such as Australia, Austria, Norway, UK, Brasil, many USA States.. and Japanese people of course - Japlish ;)
That boyfriend I had at National Teather School of Canada, an acting student from Toronto who knew no words of French and who would bring me to "chili and music" evenings where him and his friends played the guitar and sang and spoke English.
When I lived in Florida or California, when I visited Hawaii and Hong Kong.
When I participated to an online surrogate community when I pursued the dream of becoming a surrogate mother and where I met my two best friends... The whole community was composed of mostly English speaking people.
That other serious boyfriend whom got to learn to be patient when we were arguing as emotions would hinder my communication skills in ENGLISH...

I adore writing in my mother tongue. But I cannot resent or feel ashame to speak in English, or to use tools only available in English, despite my mother's nationalist advocacy that I should boycott companies unwilling to serve us in our mother tongue.: Iput so much effort into mastering English and it opened doors, cultures, skies that others only dream of...

Yes, English was hard but I am so thankful to myself that at one point in my life I had the courage to learn it and I am grateful for all it has brought into my life.

To my cousin: Yes, English is hard, but it is such things that require efforts and dedication that are worth it and that bring greatness into our lives, not easy. Easy is binging on bonbons in front of the TV, nothing positive and great will remain memorable of this in a decade, maybe just excess weight... but that's not greatness.
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