Friday, January 21, 2011
I can have a good day today. It's up to me. No matter how bad yesterday was, today doesn't have to follow its lead- NO. I can turn this ship around, and make today what I want it to be.
So here goes. I will not let my bad choices from yesterday give me leave to keep making bad choices. Yeah, that's usually what happens. I rationalize the continuation of misery. Stupidest logic ever, that starts that downward spinning cycle.
Instead, I will focus on how much glycogen must be zooming to my muscles to help me be awesome and fast in my half-marathon tomorrow morning. Yeah... I was just carb-loading, right?
I will focus on how to prepare mentally and physically for that difficult 8-mile climb from 0-1600 feet elevation, because Lord knows I will need some kind of fortitude to make it up that mountain. And when I get there, the 5.1 remaining miles will be a delicious, downhil-ish reward. That I earned. Because we gotta work for our rewards. They don't fall into our laps, and we don't just deserve them on some kind of special, pretty, skinny merit. No, we can fight to take our happiness from the world. The silly thing is, the fight isn't actually with the world itself, or even with other people. It's all within ourselves.
I'm going to fight that fight today, and let myself know that I am determined to take my happiness back. I won't let myself be miserable just because it's what is so familiar and safe. I will conquer my demons, and I will affirm my strengths by practicing them.
I would say wish me luck for my race tomorrow, but I don't need it.
I have something even better: determination.