30,000-39,999 SparkPoints 36,710

Tough times

Thursday, January 06, 2011

Just broke up with my boyfriend of 5 years and feeling really down. Am in the process of taking my necessaries to my parents 2 room condo until I find a place of my own. Have no idea how I'm going to do that on my salary, which is barely $1,000 a month.

I just feel numb. He's the only man I ever loved for any amount of time, much less 5 years. All of my best memories of the last 5 years are with him. I feel embarrassed of all things, because everyone was so sure it would work out and we were perfect for each other. Life sure if full of surprises.

I have to be positive that something good will come my way soon because it's just been so hard. Two years of a disastrous attempt at sitting for the CPA (twice they denied my application over bureaucratic fine print and they lost my case that challenged my qualifications to sit after I spend $30,000 on ANOTHER degree to meet their requirements) and now a failed relationship. The more "good" decisions I make, the worse things get.

Life is full of surprises, I'm just ready for a good one for a change. Time to visit my nephews I think. They're 3 and 4 yrs old and think I'm da bomb! :-) Nothing like a little toddler love to boost your self esteem!

I think I feel worst for my cat though. He was SOOOOOPER happy in our big town house, three floors to run around and no kids or other pets. Now it's back to one room, visiting children and my mom's b*tchy cat that he's afraid of! Poor guy...
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Dear Carissa - I feel so sad for you right now. Give yourself time and space to deal with your feelings and to take care of yourself. You may not feel like it right now, but I can see the incredible strength of your character in your post. You will make it through this and come out ahead. Glad to see you posting here. Maizey
    2477 days ago
    awwwwwwww, Carissa, I'm so sorry! emoticon Hon don't worry about nothing but keeping yourself together! don't blame yourself or him, sometimes it just isn't meant to be, even as hard as that is to swallow. emoticon vent, scream, holler, just don't put the anger on yourself, it's not yours and you don't deserve it! keep reaching out, hang in there girlfriend!
    2477 days ago
    What happened? I don't know what to say. I know it feels like good decisions make things worse but maybe in hindsight you may see that they weren't good decisions after all. You are definitely going through a rough patch but I know you are really tough and very sure of yourself. You will find your way.
    2477 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.