Monday, January 03, 2011
The whole of 2010 has been a crazy year for me. Iíve been okay, in general, but a few people close to me have had a really terrible year, and that impacted me at work. In March I had my first arthritis flare-up (NOW I know what everyoneís talking about) and that put an end to the regular exercise and weightlifting I was doing. I wasnít able to do anything physical until June, when I did some very gentle swimming (at least it was something). The fall semester was just crazy and I didnít exercise at all.
Food-wise I was on track nearly the whole year, which is a huge achievement for me. If I ate too much I made it up over the next few days. I made generally good choices when faced with food decisions. I cooked healthy meals. I made it through Thanksgiving with only a 2 pound gain.
But then came last week. Visited my family and things were stressful, and compounded by the blizzard, which trapped us all together for 2 days. By the second day I was eating out of control, and also having an Ďout of bodyí feeling as I observed what I was doing. I knew better, of course, could recognize all the signs, could have eaten other things (or nothing Ė I was eating at least twice as many calories as usual), but gave in to those old feelings of helplessness.
Got home last Thursday, bringing the last of the Xmas cookies with me, and proceeded to eat them Friday and Saturday. Yesterday shared all this emotion with DH (he hadnít come with me to see family, which added to my stress Ė not because of him, he had to work, but because I didnít have him to talk to), and together we dumped the last of the cookies (there were still a lot) into the trash and washed all the tins.
Gained 5 pounds in a week, and that leaves me 5 pounds over my goal weight.
Did a SP weigh in yesterday and realized I hadnít posted my weight in 18 months! Since then Iíve gained 8.6 pounds. This slippery slope (okay, this dramatic plunge over the cliff) will end NOW.
I canít fix the problems I see in my family Ė that is out of my control. I can control what I eat and how much I exercise, and thatís where my energy will go.