Thursday, December 30, 2010
Each of us is responsible for our lives. Not to say that everything that happens to us is within our control, but that we are responsible for how we choose to respond to the events or non-events in our lives. We are able to choose our response...we are response-able. This is not my idea, but of Steven Covey and his co-authors of "First Things First," of which I have a summary CD.
Covey explains that we are not our pasts or our futures. The memories of the past and the ideas or projections of the future may influence how we react in the present, but we choose how we react in any given moment. I am so bad at this. Most of the time it seems as though I am blown around like a oarless, rudderless boat on a stormy sea. But I'm starting to understand why this is so. I have not yet figured out what my mission or purpose in life is. I'm starting to think I do, but then life doesn't happen how I plan and I'm more confused than ever. However, I'm starting to see the wisdom of having a mission, even if it is not the ultimate one. In fact, it can be changed as life changes, or maybe as it is accomplished a new mission will emerge. But having a mission is like a steady spot on the horizon toward which I could steer.
Being response-able means not being a victim of circumstance. It also means being the actor in one's life, and not the acted-upon. Being kind to one's self no matter what is an example of choosing one's response. Each day holds so many moments to choose. At each opportunity today, as a start, I want to choose self-forgiveness.